Nyx Nyghtingale
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Daughter of Damnation Ch. 2 - Reflection
🕑 Added 2025-07-09 17:00:14 +0000 UTCThe 2000's portion of this Chapter was SO much fun to write. Not only that, but it really convinced me that Evelyn and Zadkiel were going to have a solid dynamic through the book. Sometimes relationships change as I attempt to put them to the page (In Book Two of SaS, for example, my original intention was for Vee to be even nastier), but that ended up not being the case here. Evelyn's dialogue has the exact blend of sass and hard truths that I was going for, and Zadkiel feels suitably out of their depth.
I know I've mentioned before that I don't often write comedy on purpose, other than maybe a slight turn of phrase here or there, so it was great seeing this scene come together. I'm a huge sucker for "fish out of water" tropes, but also when stories humorously juxtapose the mundane with the fantastical.
Zadkiel threatening Evelyn's existence while the light bends to their will, all while Evelyn's like "Yeah, whatever. Eat up, you're cranky," still cracks me up every time I read it.
I also wanted to stress how familiar Evelyn is with the specific phenomenon that appears to be restricting Zadkiel's abilities. After last chapter, we know that she appeared to be bound by a similar set of chains, but we didn't see her explore the ramifications of that too much. Which leads me to something that, at least for my money, is pretty interesting about this book.
This is now the second chapter in a row where we've seen Evelyn demonstrate certain knowledge, only to go back to 1938 to then learn how she acquired it. This isn't going to be the exact structure of every chapter (as in, the events aren't always going to be this closely linked), but it's a type of story structure that I've never really attempted before.
See, in my head, the sections in the past function more like memories or flashbacks. Now, I never technically say this. It would be really easy to add a line that just says "Looking down at this divine being, Evelyn began to think back to a time this happened to her..."
But that feels kinda clunky to me.
Heck, there's even a version of this story where I'm more explicit with the framing device. I could have easily added in a prologue where Amara's like "Mom! You're going to tell me how you and dad met, and you're going to tell me NOW!" and then Evelyn caves and sits them down before saying "Oh, okay, but it's a long story. And it a little meanders a little. Let's cuddle up by the hellfire hearth, make some cocoa, and I'll tell you what happened."
However, as I mentioned last time, I want this to be a standalone prequel. If the very first thing people see is an unknown character asking for context for a thing they don't understand, I think they'd be a bit confused.
Anyways, back in the story, we get to spend quite a bit of time with Zadkiel learning to eat. Again, I had a blast with those sections, and I love the ways Evelyn pushes their buttons.
The vibe changes pretty quickly when the Archangel's child starts crying, however. I wanted that moment to feel very much like someone had just popped the fun balloon, as now it's time to deal with a very serious issue. Zadkiel refuses to let Evelyn touch the child, but she needs to be fed. I did my best to show, in just a few paragraphs, how much Zadkiel cares for their kid, but also the desperation present as they realize they have no idea how to care for a human-ish child.
I've never written about parents before, and in all honesty, I have no desire to become a parent myself. That being said, the feelings aren't entirely foreign to me, and I did my best to show just how tender of a moment this part of the story was.
We also get some subtle hints through Evelyn's actions about how she feels about children, which surely have no bearing on this book.
Then it's time for a little bit of a lore dump.
One thing I'm very proud of is that my lore dumps are never just massive walls of text, and it's never just a character staring at the camera going "Well, you and I both know this, but it's important to remember that people need to eat," or something equally simplistic. Whenever I'm trying to convey important information, I try to make it feel like natural conversation to the people in the world, but also to create important back-and-forth parts of the dialogue.
The only trick with lore dumps is to inject as much character into them as possible. This chapter tells what the child is, why Zadkiel was cast out of Heaven, and what Zadkiel plans to do about it. They only directly tell Evelyn that last part, and their silence earlier goes a long way to stressing the distrust they feel towards their rescuer. Evelyn making a series of correct guesses shows how knowledgeable she is, but I think we also get to see her pragmatism on display. She's a little rough around the edges when it comes to Zadkiel, but when they go too far with their explanations, she's quick to point out the reality of the situation - if she wanted them dead, they'd be dead.
In my head, she always speaks with Zadkiel in a very specific way, which is that she forces them to carry the mental burden of the conversation as much as possible. She does very little to tell Zadkiel new information, other than what's absolutely necessary. Most of what she does is try to pick them apart, or simply make them look at the hard facts of what's going on.
Anyways, we get a fun little tease about Aurelius University, and then I reveal the plot of the 2000 section: it's time for a road trip!!
But then, of course, we have to jump in our narrative time machine and pop on back to 1938. As I mentioned last time, I'm trying to create as much conversation between the two time periods as much as possible. For this chapter, we get to see divine beings wrestle with being trapped in mortal-ish bodies, and they both experience that through hunger.
I also thought it was interesting to juxtapose Evelyn's living situation between the two time periods. She's had quite the glow-up, hasn't she?
Overall, I don't have quite as much to say about the 1938 portion of the story. I had fun researching clothing of the era, and I'm happy with the outfit I ended up giving Evelyn. I'm doing my best to give an accurate portrayal of what living in this type of environment might have been like, and if nothing else, I hope it feels realistic.
The section in the past is particularly interesting when it comes to Evelyn's personality. She's an experienced manipulator, but also incredibly prideful, and I'm doing my best to show both sides of her. Personally, I think it's very telling that she's letting her pride break through her exterior personality at times, which to be is an important indicator of how far out of her depth she is.
Cards on the table, I've got some larger themes I'm planning on playing with later in the main SaS series, and DoD has ended up being a little bit of a teaser for some of them. I won't get into specifics, but I'll just say that I'm happy I've got so much planned out so far in advance.
We get to meet some random people in the past as they walk around the Hooverville, and I even get a chance to flex some of the research I did! One of the neighbors reads aloud a newspaper article about Hitler, and that's a real article. I read through a bunch of old Chicago newspapers in preparation for this series, mostly to give myself a feel for the setting, and that specific article felt too poignant not to include. I think it's a great reminder of the era we're seeing, but also, maybe it's relevant later. Who can say?
After wandering around a bit, seeing Evelyn scheme about how she might regain her power, I finally throw another wrench in the gears. Turns out Vince has a daughter from a prior marriage!
I very much enjoyed bringing Rosie to the page, especially as I've never written children before. Is it accurate? Gosh I hope so. I don't understand kids.
More importantly, however, I think Rosie's presence in the story gives the section in the past a distinct feeling to it. On a literal level, even if Evelyn decides she wants to seduce Vince, she can't really do that with a child around. On another level, we already know from the future section that Evelyn seems to have unresolved feelings about children. What's going to happen with Rosie?
Well, you'll have to keep reading to find out. We've got a lot to learn about our characters and these disparate time periods, and I'm really excited to keep going.
Hopefully you're enjoying the story!
Nyx ♥
Comments
Nyx Nyghtingale
To be fair, I've never outright stated the year of SaS. Who can say where things are going!
Seth Rothberg
I’m very bad with dates and ages, but has Zadkiel’s kid been born too soon to grow up to be Vee? But that would be too big a coincidence, right?
AFanofRoses
I'm very much enjoying the story! It's answering a lot of questions I had, but raising so many more. I guess I'll just have to keep reading to learn more about Zadikel, their distractingly-attractive companion, and their little bundle of joy!
