Nicholas Lutsko
patreon
Changes Shape Over Time
🕑 Added 2023-06-13 22:31:02 +0000 UTC**Disclaimer** I started writing this on the Sunday after the SWORDS stream but was pulled away from it.
Thanks everyone for tuning into the SWORDS stream! We had a blast, despite the non-functioning AC. The zoom after party will be up soon, but in the meantime, I wanted to share the live debut of Carnival.
Thanks to Nym for requesting it. If I'm being totally honest, I didn't think this one could work live and have never really considered trying it. Adam prepared a loop since it was included on the SWORDS 7 inch and we just sort of stumbled through it at Thursday night's rehearsal.
I'm really happy with how it came together and feel like we acquired a new tool that is unlike any other in the toolbox.
If you aren't familiar with the origins of Carnival, I made this very long post when I first started the Patreon.
I exported this clip and played it back on my phone to make sure there weren't any glitches. My daughter became very interested and had me play it for her over and over. I told her it was "Yia-Yia's song." She's continued to sing the chorus since then, and anytime I play her the song, she smiles and says "Yia-Yia."
It got me thinking about the line "You were there at the starting line, and you'll be waiting for me." I'm pretty agnostic when it comes to the concept of being reunited with loved ones after life; I know my Yia-Yia believed it wholeheartedly which likely led to the line's inclusion. But having the experience of sharing this song with my daughter and feeling her profound response made me revisit the line.
I know this is very obvious stuff, but Sage wouldn't exist without her. In the literal sense, her existence depends on the very specific genealogy that led to her creation. But more so than that, its the same love that my Yia-Yia used to nurture my mom that she used to nurture me and the cycle continues with my daughter. The silly gibberish of "Yu-Ba-Ba-Ba-Boi" has somehow become the manifestation of that love.
This experience with my daughter broadened my interpretation of the song from a hyper-specific song about my Yia-Yia and grief to a broader celebration of love and family. We played this song in ATL during soundcheck and it was the first time I struggled not to get emotional performing it. My cousin Ricky was in the audience with his boys (he was there when I recorded my Yia-Yia singing "Yu-Ba-Ba-Ba-Boi" decades ago. It's my favorite performance of the song thus far. You can listen to it here.
I'm sure I have more to say on the topic but I've run out of time.
Talk soon!
BN
Comments
Lissa Cereal
Who's cutting all these onions.... In all seriousness, I love this song, and the emotions it stirs up. The line "Time is a criminal, it takes all in the end" just really hits home. I've always had a fear of death, and if there was a way to "cheat it." But there isn't, and we just have to make the best of whatever time we get. "Love is the tie that binds" - Family is a strong bond, but sometimes, if we're lucky, the connections we make can form a different version of "family," though not connected by blood, but still just as strong. The people in this amazing community, they feel like family to me. <3
Qua Couron
I really appreciate the links back to the origin of the song - i admit I haden't had a chance to learn about it until this, and now that I have, I understand why everyone was crying their eyes out during the stream. It's a beautiful, heart-felt song, and even just reading about it made me cry. So thank you for that. I think it's really great that you wrote it for so many reasons - but I'm not a word genie, so I'll leave it at that. I can't wait to watch the video of it live from the show! And for the next SNL. Take care of yourself after that toooour
Fergal Colreavy
Beautiful
nymaré
Thank you so much for honoring my request! Like others, this has been a favorite since I first heard it. I also don't know what I really think or feel about reunion after death, but the construction and execution of this song is something profound to me. From how much is expressed in so few lyrics to the musical arrangement and layered low hum contrasted with the hollow chime like slow, spaced out tears, so much of it is like being wrapped in a crushing hug goodbye and released. I cannot express how happy I am that it worked out so well and that others will now get to hear and experience it more often.
