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Episode 5 - Double Dick X Man

🕑 Added 2017-11-17 10:10:53 +0000 UTC

Comments

Elisabeth H Dryburgh

my mom killed Christmas and easter on easter so...

Sofia Habib

Me listening 3 years later, that chipotle story reminded me of my chipotle experiences lmaoo

sofie

ok i’m just listening to this now but first of all, it’s not just “glitter”. it’s Reindeer Food!!!!! it’s like glitter mixed w oats and some like colourful flakes and u sprinkle it on ur front lawn so the reindeers r attracted to ur house. duh. ALSO i wanted to add that my dad told us santa had had enough milk n cookies so we left santa beer and a salami sandwich. idk canada is weird amirite

Daniel Cudby

It's funny you talk about building robots, because I have just been accepted into my first year of mechatronics engineering

Kennedy

Yes my parents actually are strippers. They worked that pole every night to get me through university. Bless.

myclownshoes

Ya Gotta Throw Tha Whole Baby Away

Chelsea Suarez

Its been a week since i listened to this and I havent looked up double dick dan yet. im proud

Zack Madden

Well unfortunately my dad does not own a boat; however, I do hate football and want to kill myself!

Anam Alvi

Holding out for a podcast where you boys don't talk about dicks for 20 minutes straight. Until then you have my money.

Lili Scheel

If you're looking for a feature on that Patreon rap... Lil Scheel. Just let me know.

jordyn

buddy duress was in rikers before he was in that movie lmao

Mae Godfrey

I thought after you died you went to heaven or some shit until I was 8, but then my older sister told me that it's just infinite blackness after you die. I've been freaking out about that shit ever since.

Gwen (not Stefani)

my friend told me yesterday that she's so white she cant use normal toothpaste because the mint is way too spicy and burns her mouth.

Jakob Syvertsen

I trump all whiteness. Came home from school one day and my parents had bought 2 boats. Walk inside, and their signing a lease for a lake house. No context, no planning. Just, one day, they decided they wanted a lake house and some boats.

Sofia R

nads is not a swear

Andersen Roberts

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

Tatianna Gill

Russ probably leaves out cookies and milk for Santa

Matthew Sutch

Cody’s horrific accents are good because they’re bad. Also, come down to SD and hang with us, man. Drinks on me if you boys come down.

Greg DeVeau

1-Cody you pronounced my name correctly on the first try. I may have to start paying you bastards more money. 2-I was gunna clap back in reference to the poet jab but I was googling famous poet names and you’re right, I do sound like I belong on that list. I am now going to drop out of college and pursue my career in poetry. Will keep TMG up to date with my progress.

Malick Lombion

wtf the song was good! link please?

micayla beavers

isn't word with friends in real life just scrabble?

Hudson McCracken

Let me tell you all about Hanukkah Harry...

Megan Bowman

I know I'm late to talk about the Christmas thing, but my parents used to help me make food for the reindeer which also had glitter in it. To make things worse, my dad would always take me outside the next day and show me the reindeer footsteps. To this day I don't know what he used to make the footprints because they looked like hooves😂

Isolde Belisle Dempsey

i love my gay dads

Dana Yassin

I was in costco when i realized im gonna die. Fucking 9 year old in the costco vitamin aisle

Olivia Barry

oi my dad somehow convinced my siblings and I that santa liked beer more than milk so instead we'd put out a couple bottles on xmas eve lmao

Skilledzeus

That 5 minutes of Noel being alone while Cody was shitting, was the funniest part of the podcast lol. Keep carrying Cody my dude.

Jake Dalton

Cody and Noel talk about eating bums while Noel swivels his chair 90 degrees so he can take a sip of 1 of 2 beverages every 10-30 seconds

Amanda Powell

i was 6 or 7 years old when i realized my own mortality and i cried for hours in my bedroom and put up a paper sign on my door that said "do not enter die" so that my parents wouldn't try and talk to me because i was mad at them for putting me in a situation where i have to die

Megan McEvoy

i too put glitter and oats for reindeer, the glitter was so the reindeer could see it from the sky

Devin Higley

You guys are joking around about having the smallest dicks, but here I am...

Aidan Fraser

just pulled trig for the first time,I rate

Kat Kelliher

😂😂 super chilllll

JG

im down, where you from?

matcha latte

Anyone tryna b my gf

Mike

I lost my belief in Santa when I was about 7. I saw a news clip when my parents weren’t in the room about how a guy came to a kindergarten class and told them Santa wasn’t real. Side note, anyone here leave out oats and water for the Three Kings’ camels?

Sam Flora

This podcast was good but what could of made it better is if you would of talked about that guy with two dicks

Will

I almost died cause i choked while laughing so hard. maybe next time.

Matt Reeff

I feel like Christmas was the only time my dad could eat cookies without my fat ass bothering him. Just him crouched over in the dark going to town on some sugar cookies just laughing at how fucking dumb I am.

Uriel Ramirez

chodey went over with his equipment all hyped for the new podcast. He started to unpack everything, and as he was handing noel the headphones saying, "here bro, I got you covered" noel replied, "yeah, no, put those funky ass dollar claw machine headphones back, I got my own."

Jordan rhorer

My chimney was covered by a grate so by 1st grade I had my suspicions. I asked my mom and she said he climbs through the window. Then i thought “if this fatass can get in my window, anyone can.” That’s how i realized i was going to die

Sebastian Brudal

If you hate on Cody, just know - This guy FUCKS. He fucks hard because the moment he saw your eyes, he knew how to keep his dick fat while his cargo-shorts are full of Xan’s.

April Lauzon

my mom would take her big winter boots and sprinkle icing sugar around them and walk around the house to make it look like Santa had walked through, as you can probably tell, we are white.

dez

it’s so adorable that cody dreamt about noel 😭 pure

Uriel Ramirez

we were broke Mexicans so our house didn't even have a chimney. basically, my mom didn't even have to tell us Santa wasn't real. she did try telling us Santa had a spare key for our house tho... didn't work.

Natalia Hrab

yo I feel u guys I had bronchitis for like 2 months and I just ignored it till it went away lol

Janae

My family used to leave our front door unlocked on Christmas eve for Santa because we didn't have a real fireplace and though he wouldn't be able to get in...

Karson Koski

stop recording in noels shitty masterbation console

TMG

hahaha

Stacy Perriera

We need a fucking freestyle session with you guys. I wanna hear Noel rap

Liliana Acero-Pedroza

I love this podcast but every time Cody does an accent I lose a year of my life

Sara Michelle

i was eating lunch when you guys stared talking about the guy with two dicks and i instantly lost my appetite

Sarah Llewellyn

Uhh so Noel, when you have kids you're not gonna pretend to be Santa and eat those motherfucking cookies??? tf u will

when are you getting marcus on the podcast?`

Johnny

I'm now manufacturing and selling double dick denim pants and shoes

TyrTV

I want to see noel take a fat ass bong hit in the next patreon only podcast

Emma Cadena

Talking about traditions for Santa, my house didn’t have a chimney so my parents got a “special key” so santa could come through the front door. It was just a skeleton key we left on the table outside that couldn’t actually be used to unlock our door but my anxious ass genuinely thought some man was gonna use the key to break into our house and jack my presents.

micayla beavers

that's part of the reason all of my humor is way too fucking dark for a 17 year old girl lmao

micayla beavers

damn I thought I was the only one that had the realization of mortality at young age lmao I think I was like 6 and a half and just realized holy shit I'm going to die one day and I can't do anything about it but I didn't cry like a little bitch like noel did

Santeri Peltomäki

If you want to know how finnish people speak english, check out Hydraulic Press Channel on YouTube. Also, Vikings and cold weather have nothing to do with finnish metal scene. We just like heavy and melancholic stuff.

sofferd

Cody revealing his hairline whilst taking off his hat gave me war flashbacks of when my Dad used to slickback his hair cause he thought he was some type of member of the Italian mafia who played soccer in his spare time when he wasn’t rotating tires.

Gentry Anderson

I am not alone!

M

Could you imagine being born with two dicks, only to find out they are both certified as the smallest dicks on earth.

Kylie Reann

we used to make glitter oatmeal reindeer food every year in school growing up and sprinkle it down our sidewalk, I am too white to comprehend any other way of life

Gentry Anderson

Imagine my feelings when I found out what gentrification meant. Thx mom and dad.

thia

congrats on 10k you beautiful grilled bratwursts you

sufyaan

a lot of beautiful ppl in this comment section. just shooting my shot

юдита

congrats on 10k fellas, hopefully with the cost of living in LA yall can just about survive now x

The Log

I DO HAVE A GOOD DICK NAME

Magnus Tang Kristensen

I just imagined a Tiny Meat Gang boardgame called nads made by Mattel.

Alex Dowd

okay so my bf actually has a really small dick and i told him about this podcast and i need you guys to actually market it like that so he'll watch it because he'll laugh his ass off about how it's not actually about that because we both are really into the stuff you guys actually talk about lol

Jon Araujo

How is your bit coin doing Cody

Rachel Richardson

Cody’s New Zealand accent gave me second hand embarrassment

Mustafa Shikora

Noel just gave me the greatest way to mess with my gf. Dickpic right before important meetings 👍

Georgia Mahoney

Cody saying La Croix like an American... Have u ever sung O Canada Cody

shannon

can noel post a picture of himself as a kid so we can get a visual of the child that had a midlife crisis at age 6

Sophie Grambo

chunks of watermelon falling into a bucket of water should be an ASMR i'd listen

Mitchell Ford

came back from an intro to marketing test to this, thanks for the moistness my lords

Rebecca McConnell

btw im not lying about the buying the milk. we were just weird as shit

Rebecca McConnell

thanks for making fun of my name you guys. fuck y’all but it made my day.

Nio Jacobs

Did you just say "it's like words with friends but real life"? Bitch that's fucking scrabble.

TMG

So Santa is amazon prime

TMG

very true

TMG

thank you dog

TMG

gang

TMG

lmao

chill

love this pod

sawyer

i'm sorry, but who the fuck puts vinegar on deviled eggs????

Johnny Zurita

You can tell Noel's never been hugged ever LMAO

Tommy

yall got some tiny meat

Emily Rainwater

The ocd in me HATES that Noel’s strap on the back of his hat is always sticking out lmao

Dicky Hernandez

noel can u stop drinking things im distracted

Mai

I watch this at work while I'm on my break and my workmates are 100% sure I'm a sick in the head because of your titles, thanks guys

Jered Relopez

50 year old still making penis jokes. classic.

Connor Van Eeken

Since my house didn't have a chimney my white ass had a"Magic Key" that we would hang on the front door so Santa could get in. That shit was like a comically large old key.

Jark

you guys should do a tmg podcast trailer vid for youtube and have it be the skit of you two comparing whose meat is tinier for the world record

Tom Jordan

Speaking of convincing yourself Santa's real when I was 6 or 7 I asked my mum how Santa got into our house because we didn't have a chimney and she told me that Santa has keys to every house in the world and I was like "ah yes obviously how stupid of me"

Nio Jacobs

That intro was too lit

PRXZM

love y’all, thanks for the plug ❤️

ᵗᶦⁿʸ ʳᶦᵇˡᵉᵗ ᵇᵉˡᵉⁿ

isnt it considered a foursome if a girl with two vags and a guy with two dicks fuck

Matthew Rhoney

i brought up doing denimsgiving to my fam and they immediately turned it down for the sole fact that it doesnt stretch well after eating

Najwa

noels chipotle story had me LOLLIN

Katherine Peg

Best intro in the game.

Makayla Comelli

Dude i got two tits

Alex Vampira

I stayed up till 7Am watching this, moist content as always boys.

Eetu Kaipiainen

Cody you have the best Finnish accent I've ever heard and the biggest dick babe!

Graham Hunter

When it faded to black at the end there I really wish we would've heard Cody just go "Oh jesus Noel, put your dicks away man, nobody wants to see those."