ErikaMoen
patreon
Dear January Erika
🕑 Added 2024-02-15 22:26:04 +0000 UTCDear January Erika,
It's me, February Erika! I am writing from the future to tell you the good news: You are not depressed!
Well, wait, no, you are depressed. Like hella depressed. You're tired and weak and are spending a worrying amount of time sleeping during the day, and your inner monologue is... kind of off-putting? Like: yikes. And you're comfort-eating a lot. You're not even hungry, you're just shoving good-tasting-but-not-nutritious things in your mouth to feel a moment of relief from the existential pain of being awake and instead you come away just feeling bloated and sluggish because you're not exercising. So, yeah, that does sound kind of depressed.
But the good news! The good news is that you are right on schedule.
This happens every January.
And every January we're like "Oh God, this is how I'm going to feel and live for the rest of my life. This is who I am now."
But no! This is January.
January is dark and wet and cold. Your body is in hibernation mode which means your brain isn't getting the exercise and sunlight it needs in order to regulate The Challenging Thoughts into their allotted space where they can exist in equilibrium with All The Other Thoughts.
This is not permanent!
This is just January.
In February, the days are going to start getting infinitesimally longer. The sun is going to show up for a tiny bit more each day. You'll be able to go outdoors without a jacket. You can start riding your bike again! (Though you will need to bring rain gear, just in case) You know what happens in February? You get to plant the first of your sugar snap pea seeds outside.
Yeah.
You forgot you could do that in February, huh?
I mean, you'll have to keep an eye out for cold snaps so you can cover up your sprouts in case of a frost, but other than that, yeah, you can start planting some specific seeds now. And in March? When we're past the risk of frost? Oh, baby.
So, listen to me. I'm February Erika. I'm wise. I have a whole month's worth of experience on you, January Erika, and I'm here to tell you in all of my wisdom that what you're feeling sucks but it's literally just a matter of marking off the days on the calendar till it gets better.
Trust me.
We literally go through this every year. Why do we always forget??? It's only been forty fucking years of this on repeat.
Ok, here's what we're gunna do. We're putting this on the calendar next year.
Next year, January 1, 2025, you're gunna come back here and read this letter and you're gunna be like "Thank you, February Erika. You are so wise and kind and your ass looks incredible in those jeans." and I'm here in the future to tell you "Yes, I know, I know. Trust me, baby, February is coming so just hang in there and your ass is going to look incredible in these jeans, too. I love you. Now be a little fucking kinder to yourself this month, ok?!"
Ok!
Comments
M Aidan
Im 36 yrs into *diagnosed* seasonal affective disorder and i *still* forget. Every year. It's like my winter brain and summer brain don't communicate with eachother. I use my bullet journal to leave myself similar notes. Kudos to you being kind and helpful to January Erika ❤️
Elizabeth Claassen
I feel this so hard. I think I'm going to put it on my calendar and substitute names and activities as needed. Thank you. And happy peas!
