elizabeth_oswald
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Chapter One hundred sixty-three – #Asparagus
🕑 Added 2025-09-17 21:01:14 +0000 UTC“Yes, I got pretty sick…what, almost two years ago?” Miller said.
He sat straight in his chair, posture erect but relaxed, everything about him reading comfortable and attentive. He’d been in the hot seat for several minutes now, while Augustus worked up to the important questions, and didn’t seem to notice that this one was any different from the ones before.
“It was shortly after winter began, when everyone tends to get sick,” he continued with a small laugh. “Even I wasn’t really worried about it, but I just kept getting worse and worse, and then the maid I’d caught the illness from died.” He frowned slightly. “It really was unfortunate. She was an excellent servant, and seemed like a nice enough girl.”
Well, that wasn’t the most sensitive thing to say about someone after they passed away, but this young man had probably never exchanged a single word with the maid that wasn’t an order of some kind. Augustus didn’t react to the comment except to ask, “Had anything unusual happened to her before she became ill?”
Miller paused, thinking, then shrugged. “Not that I know of. I rarely spoke to her, she was just one of many people who made sure the household ran smoothly.” He leaned forward, giving a slightly conspiratorial smile. “I appreciate all of them, of course, but I don’t notice them, if you know what I mean.”
“Of course,” Augustus said easily, matching the lean. “But you did notice when she died?”
Again, Miller shrugged. “Not exactly. I knew because my parents became much more concerned when they discovered she had passed away from the same sickness I had. They contacted the church and had them send over a Light healer, and I was on the mend by the next day.”
The chancellor’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly. “So the healer was able to help you?”
“Of course,” the young man said, almost too brightly. “Light elementalists are remarkable. I was truly fortunate that one was available.”
Augustus offered a bland smile, his eyes flicking toward Pandy. He’d done this several times already, and, just as she’d done every time before, she shook her head. There was no trace of Dark Aura around this boy.
A bare moment of silence hung, and Pandy waited for the other usual question: had Miller ever been kidnapped, or had anyone tried to abduct him? The question didn’t come, however, as Augustus rose to his feet, offering his hand to Miller for the second time. This time, however, Miller flinched slightly when their fingers came together, and Augustus quickly pulled his hand back, apologizing profusely. As he did, he put his right hand into this jacket pocket – not the magical one – where he’d stuffed the handkerchief he’d offered the boy after Miss Cupcakes scratched him. He removed his hand almost immediately, drawing the handkerchief partway out of his pocket.
“Is your hand all right?” Augustus asked. “I can call for Mistress Rose, if-”
Again, Miller’s finger went into his mouth, and he cleaned off any trace of blood from his reopened wound. His smile was a bit tighter this time, as he said, “It’s fine. I have a few bandages back in my room, but I doubt I’ll even need them.” He glanced between the chancellor and the librarian, expression shifting to curiosity.
“Is that all you need? I hope I was able to help,” he said, already reaching for his bag.
Augustus nodded. “We’re investigating an illness that’s been going around recently, trying to find out how contagious and dangerous it is. The timing of your illness is about right, so we’ll add it to the data we’ve collected. Thank you for your time.”
Miller waved it off. “Anything to get out of class for a little while.” He hesitated as he turned to go. “Is there anyone else I should call for you?”
Augustus started to shake his head, but Professor Beeswick laid his finger against the page he’d been reading and said, “Rosalind.” He looked up. “Do you know her? She should be a year beneath you.”
The brown eyes had looked slightly confused, but now the young man’s expression cleared. “There are two Rosalinds, but one is the same age as me. I’ll let Chancellor Barrington know you need her, shall I?”
The dragon smiled back, showing a little more of his pointed, predatory teeth than he usually did when talking to students. “That would be most helpful, thank you,” he said, nodding. Miller nodded back, including Pandy and Miss Cupcakes in his charming smile, and exited the room.
As soon as the door clicked shut behind him, Augustus removed the handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to Professor Beeswick. As he did, Pandy could see the faintest smear of red on it, and realized the chancellor had intentionally broken open the boy’s wound so he could get a blood sample. But what were they going to do with it?
The dragon answered this question by lifting the cloth to his nose, inhaling deeply, eyes closing as he took in the scent of blood. Then, to Pandy’s shock, he touched his tongue to the spot, tasting it in a quick flick that was far more reptilian than anything else she had seen him do. He paused for a moment, then shook his head. “Nothing,” he told Augustus reluctantly.
<Cast Shifting Faces,> Pandy thought, feeling a surge of something that almost could have been excitement, but absolutely was disgust. Because why would any sane human being be excited by what she was about to do?
Shifting Faces successful.
You have 02:14:27 remaining today.
Of course, Pandy had forgotten she was sitting on the table, and she teetered forward as she swelled up into her full human size. Fortunately, Augustus and the professor were looking at each other, not her, so they totally didn’t- Both men turned to look at her, disturbingly similar expressions of amusement in their eyes, and Pandy sighed internally. Of course they noticed. Why did they always notice?
Swinging her legs around so she was sitting properly on the table, rather than in an awkward half-stand, half-belly flop, Pandy thrust out her hand. “Let me try.”
A second went by as Professor Beeswick stared at her, and Pandy pumped a completely internal fist of triumph. Ha! She could surprise them! By offering to taste blood, but still…
As she accepted the piece of cloth the dragon held out to her, Pandy briefly reflected on the fact that blood used to make her slightly queasy, and now she was voluntarily going to not only touch a stranger’s blood, but ingest a tiny bit of it. This world had definitely changed her. For the better, she hoped, but really, given what she was doing, that was up for debate.
Carefully, Pandy tapped the tip of her tongue against the red-smeared cloth. Nothing happened, so she went in for more of a lick-type situation, her cheeks flaring red at the astonished gazes following her every move. When this still yielded no results, she looked at them.
“Um, do you…need this back? Because I have one more thing I can try, but it won’t really be usable after that, and I don’t want to steal your blood, if you’re not done with it.” She winced as she finished speaking. She sounded like some kind of overly polite vampire.
Augustus glanced at Professor Beeswick, who shook his head. The dragon had that look in his eyes that made Pandy feel like a germ beneath a microscope. Could you see germs beneath regular microscopes, or was that some kind of special device? “I have a few other things I could try, but… Ah, here.”
He held out a clawed hand, and Pandy placed the handkerchief into it. A few flicks of sharp talons, and the dragon took a tiny, deep red piece of cloth and tucked it into a box he pulled from his own pocket. The box was made of clear glass, pressing the material between the bottom and the inside of the lid as he snapped it shut and placed it back into the pocket. Solemnly, he handed the rest of the cloth back to Pandy.
She turned it over, noting that the blood had seeped out into the fabric, turning what was probably a single drop of blood into a stain that touched two or three square inches of fine white material. With a grimace, she stuffed the whole thing into her mouth and attempted to swallow it whole.
It appeared that she could add ‘choke’ to the list of things she didn’t do any more, because even though she could feel the fabric sticking to the inside of her throat, she didn’t get that desperate, terrified feeling she used to get when a piece of something got lodged in her esophagus. This happened with such regularity that she bought herself one of those anti-choking masks so she could suck things out without help. That was so much better than throwing herself over the back of a chair whenever she felt like she was about to die.
Now, however, she just felt the urge to pull it back out, so she swallowed a few more times, finally managing to get it down, while far too aware of the horrified look on Augustus’s face, and the fact that Professor Beeswick was holding the chancellor back while he tried to get to her.
At last, after vigorously thumping herself on the chest with the heel of her hand, Pandy opened her mouth to speak. Of course, like a waiter who didn’t really want to know how your meal was going, this was the moment the System chose to speak to her.
Well, that was awkward.
And kind of gross.
But hey, I have good news for you!
+10 Corruption Points for Eating the Blood of a Dark Mage
May I interest you in a nice Chianti?
Dark Mage. Yes, she knew he was a Dark mage. She wanted something else. Anything else that would make that humiliating experience worthwhile. <That’s all?>
Do you think I’m a medical lab?
Pandy?
What did you just do?
<Kappa?> Pandy barely remembered to change the name before thinking it. <Where have you been?>
…
Busy.
With…stuff.
But what did you do?
<Just ate some blood,> Pandy thought, trying not to give away the serious ick she got from having to say it. <I was hoping the System might tell me something about the guy whose blood it was.>
What?
That’s not what the System is for!
But I can tell you something.
That guy has been around, uh, the character you’re supposed to be.
Or if not around her, exposed to her magic in some way.
She almost got a ping off of you!
I had to reconfigure the firewalls to keep her off of us!
Pandy paused, reading and rereading these words, trying to make them make sense. <Um, Kappa, what does that mean? Firewall? Isn’t that something programmers use to keep hackers away?> Pandy had very little knowledge about technology beyond what she needed to know in order to use her phone or tablet. When she was in high school, the entire school network went down every time she tried to log on, and she definitely wasn’t welcome in Robotics Club after the thing with the Roomba and the glitter cannon.
Yes!
You’re the one who asked me to work on your System.
I’ve just been doing a little research to help me figure it all out.
What else do I have to do?
#letsgetreal
<Did you just hashtag me?> Pandy demanded.
“Ah, Pandora?” A hand waved in front of her eyes, pulling her back to the moment. Augustus was gazing into her face, a frown of concern on his own lips. His soft, really close lips. She was already swaying forward when he said again, “Pandy?” and she jerked away, almost tumbling over onto Miss Cupcakes, who hissed furiously. Pandy flopped like a landed fish as she desperately tried not to roll onto the cat or off of the table, and finally ended up flat on her back, staring up at the soft light bleeding in through the recessed windows on the top level of the library.
Wait. Bleeding. Blood. Oh! She shot upright, almost whacking Augustus in the forehead with her chin as he reached out to help her up. Looking from the chancellor – who looked almost as flustered as she felt, for once – to the dragon, Pandy said, “That guy has been in contact with Assssss…” She trailed off, biting her lip as she realized that it wasn’t a good idea to say the names of powerful beings in this world. “Asparagus? Uh, the, um…a person who’s definitely, probably already helping the bad guys.”
“Definitely probably?” the dragon asked, sounding both amused and slightly scandalized by her poor choice of words.
Pandy bit her lip, but nodded. “Somebody no one not involved in all of this,” she made a big, swirly motion with her hand, “would have any reason to know.”
Comments
Elizabeth Oswald
Thank you! I use a name generator for background characters, and grabbed two off the list instead of just one 😅 Like I always tell my daughter, "Weird just means you do things in ways other people don't expect." Like eating handkerchiefs.
Elizabeth Oswald
Teehee. I also thought about all the fun things associated with asparagus, including The Smell.
Joseph Sikorski
Asparagus is better than just calling some big bad the Ass. They might appreciate that even less.
Gregory
"There are two Gwendolyns, but one is the same age as me. " - happens right after they ask to speak to "Rosalind". Interesting that the demon queen can detect when blood she's interacted with has been... connected with? Though if corruption points are demon magic then that does make some amount of sense. And congratulations, Pandy, on being weird. You may need to explain some of the few things you haven't already explained.
