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(Vol 5) Chapter 51: Please Sign (In Blood) Where Indicated
🕑 Added 2024-06-23 15:11:52 +0000 UTCSammy stared at Bast — with his grin as devilish as any Zadkiel had worn — and felt herself just as ‘at a loss’ for how to respond as everything else he’d said since she related the story. She did not know what she could say to personal oaths set for some distant horizon, or to passionate macho rivalry that was probably becoming more and more natural to him.
We’re dealing with an entity far beyond who I’m looking at. Here I was hoping he’d shrug things off since Marjorie was restored. Fat chance of that. Even if he was the type to make casual oaths all day before, the particular oaths he made weren’t casual to begin with.
Perhaps with enough preponderance of time, she could soften his position…
Bast looked up from the table to meet her eyes soberly. “I also wish to speak with him. Soon.”
Sammy shook her head at this. “Bast, if you threaten him, you’ll complicate things and you’ll only tip your own hand-”
“I don’t care about that, Goddess. He needs to know what he did. Does he even know?”
Her mouth opened and closed once. Crap on a cracker! “Not specifically. I’ll tell him.”
“No. Let me. It’s my point to make. Even if you did, I’d still want to hammer in the significance.”
“Damn it, Bast, I don’t need infighting during a war of independence! Independences — plural!”
“Not infighting — competition. Inevitable, really.”
“You’re going to present yourself as someone who hates him desperately. You’ll register as a direct threat.”
“Maybe he needs a little reminder to keep in line. You can’t tell me this isn’t common in the Land of Naug. I know better. Bring Azure out — she can back me up on that!”
“I’m not bringing Azure out, you bastard!”
“You know, that’s a rather nasty insult where I’m from.”
“Good!”
He eyed her with narrowed eyes for a split moment, then suddenly barked out laughter. “Haha! Touché. Look, you can’t keep us apart forever, anyway, so a meeting is inevitable, as are the words I intend. So, do you want them spoken in the wild or in some manner of a controlled environment and supervised? I’d prefer the latter except I suspect it would preclude me from striking while the iron is hot.”
“That’s exactly what I want to avoid!”
“Nonetheless, I ask.”
With a frustrated sigh, Sammy said, “You’re a giant asshole, Bast.”
“I like to think I’m more of a ‘just right’ asshole, not too big, not too small.”
“Whatever you want to tell yourself.”
“Oh, but I do! In the mirror, every morning, hoping especially that you’ll overhear. Or see — as I make sure to do it in the nude!”
“Tch-!” Sammy cut herself off, closed her eyes, and took a breath. “Okay. You can talk to him. But it will be after the contract is decided.”
“I have no further objections, oh Mistress of Heaven.”
She glared at him for a spell, for a host of reasons. Unfortunately, she blurted, “You don’t really do that, do you? In the mirror?”
He smiled fiendishly. “Oh, I do a host of things in mirrors after Constance turned me onto the idea, saying how you’re always there, even if subconsciously. It adds a certain spice to things.”
Mortified, Sammy rose from the chair to go, while throwing up her hands to the heavens. “Why did I ask? Why?!”
Sammy left the grinning, lecherous pervert without another word, heading back through a mirror to the hideout, where she dematerialized to send her mind and spirit fully to Heaven once more.
Bast and Zadkiel really compete for Most Insufferable. I could always hope they end up getting along after sharing their mutual horndogness.
It was time to finalize the deal, get it over with, and move on to whatever the deal was with… dealing with the deal. Because Zadkiel was stuck there for days no matter what, she was going to have to contact entities of his realm. It was going to be interesting, she had no doubt of that.
The only liaison she knew was some sort of mysterious demoness Servitor that had been set up with Jeeves, but he had gone dead cold on that connection. It hadn’t mattered, as that liaison had never attempted communication after the incident.
I bet it’s a succubus secretary. His administration team is probably made up of nothing but hot, slutty succubi wagging their tails all suggestive-like, being irresistible. Just what I fucking need!
Samantha in her armored form, Azure, and the floating Sancus came down the steps of the dungeon area and approached Zadkiel’s cell. He was waiting for them with his hands gripping the bars.
Before he could even open his mouth, Sammy snapped her fingers, and with it triggered Zadkiel’s ability to change his form and shapeshift in her realm within the bounds of ‘reasonable humanoid.’
The little imp-like figure’s eyes widened briefly before he grew out in every direction into the ‘Old Zadkiel’ she knew, a red-skinned giant two and a quarter meters tall and muscularly framed like a gym bro. He included a humble, simple white robe in the Geirkos style, similar to something from Ancient Greece. It was probably to show off the muscles.
“Haha!” He exclaimed in a booming voice, flexing a bicep and admiring it. “That’s more like it!” He sobered up quickly as he regarded the approaching Samantha. “Thank you. I take it the contract is a go, then?”
“Don’t jump to conclusions,” Samantha declared coolly. “Think of this as a sign of trust and as a reward for making as much progress as you have toward a solution, instead of drooling on the floor all day fantasizing about a deific threesome.”
Zadkiel barked a laugh and grinned as his hands resumed their grip on the bars. “Yes, well, when the Cat’s Away…”
Trying not to roll her eyes, Samantha gave a small nod to Sancus, who produced the massive, layered scroll of the contract and let the paper roll down and out to the floor. The floating feline said, “We have some amendments,” and handed it over for Zadkiel’s review. “They’re highlighted with light.”
Frowning, Zadkiel began skimming and flipping through. His reactions varied between ‘hmms,’ ‘mm hmms,’ slow growls, squinted-eye frowns, and amused chortles. When he flipped all the way through, he sighed and gave a withering look to Samantha and Sancus. “You removed all provisions in regards to Redberry.”
“And you weren’t expecting that?” Samantha countered with flagrant derisive tones. “That’s not my business and I don’t own her, you oafish buffoon! I will not bake in a marriage to the contract under any circumstances.”
He snarled once, then glared at her. She crossed her arms and returned the glare intensity degree for degree. Finally, Zadkiel broke the heated contest of eyes with a huff and a raised eyebrow. “So you don’t object to the idea, then.”
Exasperated, Sammy tried to turn her sigh into a simple breath, remembering the tutelage of Sancus. Cool, calm, collected. It still came out as a sigh. “Dude, that’s her decision, not mine. For fuck’s sake… if you can convince her, so be it. Whatever.” Suddenly, she pointed a finger at him. “But you will not leverage me for it! Leave me out of it.”
“I don’t want to leave you out of it.” Zadkiel held up the contract and waggled it. “And you need me to sign this, so I’m going to demand some sort of assurance. Your blessing, at least.”
Sancus was in Sammy’s head to forestall an outburst. “He’s going to dig in his heels for a nugget here. This is right where you want a signee, Your Majesty — committed to a minor, deeply personal allowance. Exploit it.”
Samantha did not need to fake frustration, but Sancus’s words fragmented her anger into a general sputtering flabbergastedness. She clenched her fists and gave a little growl — “Mrrgh!” — before turning away from him entirely to cool her responses further.
“You’re an insufferable ass, Zadkiel,” Azure ventured airily.
“I know,” was his immediate reply. “That growl she just made was worth it, though — you have to admit. Adorable, eh?”
“No comment.” The unspoken ‘lest I get myself in trouble’ was obvious.
Fucking Zadkiel! Fucking Naugites! How is a growl cute?! It’s not cute!
Samantha turned around calmly and approached the bars to stare up at the giant Zadkiel. Damn it, this isn’t half as intimidating as when he was small. Should I grow? No. “The stipulation will be that I will fully bless any coupling between you, but you must not mention this to Redberry in whatever stupid courting rituals you attempt to woo her. You did not even run it by me yet, do you understand? The ball will be entirely in her court.”
Through it all, Zadkiel was studying her judiciously. He cocked his head and said softly, “You care for her very deeply. You love her.”
Samantha, somewhat stunned by the response, nonetheless replied quickly, “Yes. She is among the first to whom I felt kinship with in this world.” I might’ve just given away my newness. Oh well.
His head shifted to look away, his expression thoughtful. “Fascinating as usual, Puck…”
Azure popped into Sammy’s mind. “As unsophisticated and lecherous as he is, I think genuine relationships are the most important thing to him, Goddess. He’s been entirely starved of this his entire life, but he’s seen enough of them to crave it in whatever form he can find. Not so different from the way I’ve been time and again.”
With a burst of laughter, Zadkiel bellowed, “Haha, very well, then! The game is on. If she comes to you of her own accord, you won’t dissuade her?”
“No. I’ll be neutral and supportive of what she wants, Zaddy- Zadkiel.”
He smirked in pleasure at the slip, as he used a prominent demonic canine to bite his finger. Blood pooled and traveled down a claw, which he used to pen script onto the contract. “I’m making the final amendment with that very assurance. If you break it, renegotiation of this amendment will be necessary.” He finished and presented the quite neat blood-born script out toward them to read. “Acceptable?”
Ugh! Lawyery wording.
Sancus read it very quickly then turned to Samantha and nodded. “It’s precisely as he said.”
“Yeah with ten times the words needed…”
Zadkiel chortled and shrugged. “I learned the necessity in dealing with your advocate here. I had to fight for every shred of leeway beyond his offering, but thankfully you assigned a reasonably fair baseline. Rare for anyone dealing with a devil not to impose complete slavery.”
In a teasing tone, Samantha replied, “Getting awfully honest before the signatures are even scribbled.”
“True.” He smiled faintly and took a deep breath before making the final marks on multiple pages, his expression sobering completely in the process. Finally, he handed it to Samantha. “Your turn, and note that the last page is the final nail in the coffin.”
“Right,” Samantha muttered as she took the massive thing. She didn’t pore through it in-depth but did stall to skim and peruse to verify there was nothing Sancus had left out that concerned her, invoking [Magineer] to speed-read and absorb. But all was in order and the cat-lawyer knew her contract/legal desires possibly better than she did.
It was more like a bunch of smaller contracts, as consequences for breaking any given provision were spelled out separately so that minor breaches weren’t some immediate nullification. Breaches were System-mandated, so it was nearly impossible to hide them unbeknownst.
Okay, here we go! A better-behaved Demon King and a grand alliance to crush the old empire. We’re bringing the heat and we’re going to win! Progress cannot be stopped!
Summoning her pen, she began to sign the pages and draft the first letters of Victory…
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