thedude3dx
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Peak Performance 2, pages 15 to 20!
🕑 Added 2024-05-01 00:16:36 +0000 UTCAlright, the final section of buildup is finally COMPLETE! From here on out it's sex, sex, sex. And I have so many ideas in mind for that! :D
I'll let you guys be the judge, but my intention for these past 20 pages were to do some character writing. I've always been pretty decent at world building and creating settings. But it's in character writing that I think a story really determines whether it's worth following or not. I've really tried to create distinct personalities for each of the ladies:
Jessica, somewhat arrogant and distant, but more excited about things than she lets on. I wanted to go for the rich trophy wife type but with the twist of having asserted herself rather than being content to be someone else's armcandy.
Nikki, a bubbly porn bunny with a big heart and more smarts than she lets on. If you came away with the sensation that she's leaning into her blonde bimboness because it's an ideal that she chased for herself, but that before her transformation she might've been a different type of girl entirely, then I accomplished my goal.
And Marcella. Killer body, killer cock. Everything you'd want in a dream dickgirl bimbo. But she's out in the open world and challenged by her own insecurity. Is she just a clone of Tatiana's? Is she just a creation of Kayla's? Peak 2 should be as much about her discovering herself, as other people discovering her body.
I might've leaned a bit too heavily into some of the mood and tone swings from one page to another but all things considered, that's stuff that can be improved in the future. I didn't want to let perfect be the enemy of good, so even if I didn't think it was completely what it should be in some places, I wanted to just get it out there too and see how you guys react to it. So, very open to feedback!
Next up, gonzo :D
Comments
TheDude3DX
Breanna's mom is one of those characters I've wanted to do for a long time but never got around to. She may just have to become the newest member of the cast? Haha.
Aaron Ferguson
I agree on what TheGreatCornholio said about Breanna's Mom. that would be great to see your take on what a MILF is! ALSO, Marcella DEFINITELY does have stage fright/performance anxiety going on. I think that Jessica and Nikki are PERFECT for Marcella in this situation.
TheDude3DX
Yeah I have a few ideas about the specific circumstances in which Kayla and Nikki met. Keep in mind, she's the CEO. She doesn't necessarily go in to every clinic and inspect the results on every client in person. There's a few ways to go here :) Mari will definitely be interesting to explore similarly, but her context will be very different. Breanna knows all about Mari because Kayla completely informed her. So Breanna's role is both that a lover and a guide. Which comes with potential downsides for Mari too, because she's basically completely at Breanna's mercy ;)
TheGreatCornholio
Pretty awesome. I am kinda sad you didn't get to use some of the renders, especially 86 or something similar. Would have been nice to have a page with Nikki checking out Marcella bent over in order to see all the equipment that she comes with lol. She may have been with Kayla, but it was probably brief and I presume the CEO didn't have the time or inclination to be fully examined by some random client. I think you did a good job at showing us their personalities so congratz on that. I am particularly happy with how Nikki turned out. From the previews she felt to me like the least interesting and most generic. I don't really like the ditzy blond bimbo trope, at least as a complete personality. She can be that during the sexual encounters, or how she views herself in relation to her partners, but I was happy to see there was more to her and not just a generic trope. The tone swings and mood worked because imo it was needed for Marcella's first solo flight. As you said this is her first time outside the circle of people who made her/know about her origin, and she's also on a "mission" from her boss. She generally seemed really cocksure (lol) in PP1 and in TRE3 (even if there was no dialogue) so I presume this is her way of being, but she does have to find her footing first with completely new people that, for the first time in her life, don't know who she is. I hope we see something similar to what Marcella's going through with Mari as well when we get to the bridal comic. Obviously she's been out in the world for longer, but it would be nice to her her thoughts (and Breanna's) about her future wife and what she expects from life. I know you did some of that in A Special Lady, but it didn't seem to involve much beyond the sex part.
