Kina Grannis
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the lost demos continue... (patron-exclusive)
🕑 Added 2020-10-23 03:43:30 +0000 UTCi found another lost song for you :) it's called "all you get" and it's from back in 2013. i think it was on my original list of 20-something songs contending for a spot on elements. i really loved this song, but sadly it never quite settled into itself. it went through several lyrical iterations but in the end it still felt like some parts of it didn't belong. it didn't come to me it its entirety in the first sitting like they usually do, so the holes i had to fill in later just never felt right.
but all that aside, it's still such a special song to me. if you've been listening to my music for some time now, i'm sure you'll see a LOT of familiar themes pop up from other songs of mine. it's funny how much of life is spent circling around the same issues and demons. working on them, making progress, then somehow staring them right back in the face again. come on, life!
for maybe one of the first times ever though, i listened back on the lyrics of this song and realized, WOW. i have actually come such a long way from the place i was at when i wrote this song! so horribly locked away inside myself, so paralyzed by my social anxiety, and desperately longing to tell the people i loved what i felt inside, but not knowing how. well, some seven years later, i have somehow made progress on these fronts, and i could almost cry realizing this. these feelings were with me for so much of my life, and it seemed impossible i would ever find a way out of these patterns. so grateful to feel a little freer within myself these days.
lyrics are below. hope you enjoy this little song :)
sending lots of love and gratitude to you all.
xo
kina
p.s. new song "crawl" out next tues AHH
p.p.s. follow me on twitch to hang out on my next stream!
all you get
i wish my mother could know my feelings
when i can't find the words
i write it in a letter, scrawled out on pages
the million things she's worth
what i can't say could fall away
can you try to understand it's not easy
how i'd love to open up and just be me
oh and i want to walk away from this
start over again
but i'm stuck in this head for the moment
that's all you get
could i be crazy, just fearful maybe
how can i never learn
in honor of persistence i light a candle
and i end up with burns
have i forgot all that i'm not?
can you try to understand it's not easy
how i'd love to open up and just be me
oh and i want to walk away from this
start over again
but i'm stuck in this head for the moment
that's all you get
Comments
All I can say is Wow. π³ Even your demos are amazing. β€
Welp, this is going on loop now...
I second this!!
This.
I haven't gotten to fully dive into the lyrics, but I wanted to share that I'm very much in love with this on the first listen. :)
next album idea: "The Lost Demos" - just the demos of songs that didnt make it on an album. These babies are lost, put them somewhere so they all belong together. <3
So glad you exist in the same time as I do. So glad I found your music, so you can sing how I feel. Thank you so much Kina
This song hits somewhere deep. I knew it would take me somewhere emotionally so I didn't do it until I had a block of open time. This song is so beautifully done and I feel the pain / struggle so strongly. Thank you for encapsulating the struggle through a song; it's better than I could ever verbalize. Thank you for sharing this with us even tho it's not something you felt was done to your liking <3
Brilliant, flawless. Would love to hear it on your next album...
sammmmm πππβ€οΈππ»
I literally cannot wrap my head around how gorgeous this one is.
Woohoo! \o/
This song/its meaning hits home HARDπ₯Ί (in a good way:)) Also yay for Crawl!!
I haven't listened yet so I won't comment on the song and this post, but my main takeaway is we finally get Crawl! Which means it's the end of October already??..
Thank-you for sharing such a beautiful song. I find personal growth often comes to us as a pleasant surprise, it's like an awakening or sudden understanding or breakthrough versus a slow / gradual change where we notice the incremental changes. The Sanskrit word for understanding means "to go someplace else" which I quite like. It seem to connote more possibilities by seeing things from a new perspective.
