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PATREON ASMR| FAINT WHISPERING/SEMI INAUDIBLE WHISPERING WITH HAND MOVEMENTS (LIFE UPDATE
🕑 Added 2019-04-30 09:50:17 +0000 UTCHey loves! First off, how are you? How have you been feeling mentally and physically? Was this month anything special, or just another month? I hope you all know I never want any of you to feel alone. This Patreon is not only my safe space to open up, but yours as well. I hope we all can support one another.
Apologies up front for my lack of making sense. Due to my conditions I have horrific brain fog. It effects my speech, thinking, writing, etc. I get awful anxiety typing these posts/filming because I'm very insecure over the fact that I might not make sense. (Just to be so open and honest)
This month has been the hardest I've had in a very long time....while filming this video I feel like I was very shut off and numb if that makes sense. I had filmed it once before, but couldn't stop crying so I tried holding it in to not seem like a train wreck or not make everything seem "poor me" But the reality is, is that we are all train wrecks sometimes. And that's beyond OKAY! This day of filming I think I was/am scared of being so vulnerable that I tried to hold it together as best as possible. Plus, the previous attempt to film this was so all over the place with tears I was scared no1 would be able to understand me. LOL! With all of this being said....I hope you don't feel so alone and isolated in your struggles. I hope I can continue to open up about my struggles and not feel so ashamed of my mental health issues....as if its a set back. I choose to take it as a chance to grow, a chance to be able to do better because I will know better. I choose to take this time to really practice some self love, to learn tools for coping with my chronic illnesses.
Thank you all once again for another amazing month here on Patreon.
I love you all lots and lots! XOXO
Comments
Dionna
omg Maddie! I live in California! I keep hearing about how you have very few friends in California and every time im like omg me!! haha i don't know if thats weird or not but you're ever up for it! My instagram is boodeez :) I live in LA County if you're close 😃
Lisa Rennison
Of course I can’t speak for everyone, but you are definitely not disappointing me! I think we can all understand if you need to take a break, whether it be for a month or not, but you have to do what’s best for you. I do think that it gives you a reason to get out of bed, like you said, so maybe that is what’s best, but only you can decide that. Love you, Maddie!
