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BTC 2.0: Chapter 19
🕑 Added 2024-05-05 23:12:01 +0000 UTC-- CHAPTER 19: Head Girlfriend --
****
The pint-sized Grand Inquisitors grilled me for details of Eva’s return for close to an hour - a duration that exceeded the amount of time Eva actually spent in the house with me, including GT2. Given that I refused to give away any of Eva’s secrets, and that I didn’t want to share the sordid details of our sexual encounters (other than to admit there HAD been sexual encounters), I had surprisingly little to offer them, much to both girls’ frustration. And after they were finally done with me, Lily turned to Belle and queried, “Should we call in a Code Blue?”
Belle shook her head. “Nah. This doesn’t rate a Code Blue. We save those for the real emergencies where we need to drop whatever we’re doing and come running.”
I arched an eyebrow in surprise, turning my attention from Belle to Lily, asking, “Have the girls actually called a Code Blue since you joined us?”
“Well, no,” Lily admitted. “Which is why I’m still curious as to what exact circumstances would demand one.”
“I sincerely hope you never have to find out,” I told her seriously.
Lily shrugged before glancing back at Belle. “But we still need to discuss this with Neevie and Sam in committee, right?”
“Oh, totally,” Belle agreed.
Mentally and emotionally exhausted from both my afternoon with Eva and now my recent Grand Inquisition, I immediately groaned and let my head loll over the top of the backrest at the idea of discussing things “in committee”.
“Neevie will be home soon,” Belle continued, ignoring me completely. “And I’ll call Miss Royal Head Girlfriend to see if she’s willing to take time out of her ‘busy’ schedule and deign to grace us with her presence.”
I picked my head up at the mocking tone in Belle’s voice and her fingers curled in air quotes, and shot her a harsh look. “Hey, give Sam a break. They just put her in charge of the Writing Committee for her Pre-Law Society, which is almost unheard of for a freshman to be given that role. It’s a big deal to her, and we all knew going in that her priority was going to be on her academics,” I stated defensively.
“Then her priorities are wack,” Belle scoffed. “I mean, she’s always been studious, but she at least made time to hang out with The BTC back in high school. Even putting aside how your supposed ‘Head Girlfriend’ can barely make a minimum of effort to spend time with you, have you noticed she can’t even make a minimum of effort to spend time with us? We live in the same house for fuck’s sake. The BTC was always about the group.”
“She was here on Friday night for all of us and Lily.”
“Friday nights have always been everyone spending time together, although she’s missed a couple of those as well. But where was she all weekend, huh? Maybe you were too busy sucking face with your no-longer-virgin ku’uipo to notice, but Sam was gone.”
“That’s not true. You two still went running Sunday,” I pointed out.
Belle rolled her eyes. “We barely talked. She set a blistering pace, was always at least ten feet in front of me, and even when she stopped to wait for me to catch up, she’d take off again right away. For the rest of the weekend, with you and Lily honeymooning and Eva going AWOL, Neevie and I were all by ourselves.”
Both Lily and I frowned at each other at the bitterness in Belle’s tone, and Lily quickly turned to hug her bestie.
“I’m so sorry, B,” Lily said apologetically. “We didn’t notice you--”
“Oh, I’m not mad at you,” Belle cut her off. “You think I wanted you or Matty worrying about me for your first weekend together? Neevie and I went out of our way to leave you guys alone. I’m not even really mad at Sam; I’m more… resigned. I’m just saying that: in the old days, Sam would’ve been right there with us. The BTC is supposed to stick together. But I’m not the only one who thinks Sam’s chosen her new Pre-Law circle of friends over us, am I?”
Lily and I looked at each other again, neither of us knowing how to respond to that. But we ultimately didn’t have to as the sound of the front door opening got all of our attentions, and a few seconds later Naimh came around the corner.
The redhead initially smiled at the sight of us seated in the living room, but when she read our less-than-enthusiastic expressions, her smile faded.
“What did I miss?”
****
Having absolutely no interest in having another discussion “in committee”, I went to make dinner while Belle and Lily not only recapped the entirety of their Grand Inquisition regarding Eva’s visit with me this afternoon, but also Belle’s little diatribe about Sam’s escalating pattern of absence.
Thankfully, when I set out the dishes, brought dinner out, and then asked if we could please talk about something else, they agreed to table the discussion until after the meal.
I’d made food early, so technically Eva didn’t keep her promise to be back by dinnertime. Or, well, one could argue that she did keep her promise to be back by “dinnertime” because she did arrive several minutes before what would’ve usually been our regular dinnertime. But then, one could argue that she only arrived on time because I’d called her to let her know I was making food early and to come over soon.
You know what? Doesn’t matter. Arguing these little details? Not worth the wasted time or mental effort. You see what the girls do to me?
In any case, the doorbell rang exactly twice just a couple of minutes after we’d started eating. I got up to let her in with a casual, “Howzit, hoalauna?” and a shaka sign. Eva had been looking at me with a rather nervous expression, but my relaxed demeanor and Hawaiian hand-signal seemed to put her at ease.
I think Eva was expecting to walk into the house, feel a distinctly non-tropical chill in the air, and be blanketed by a thick layer of tension while the BTC girls stared daggers at her. But much to her surprise, all three of them immediately turned to face her with happy and welcoming smiles.
“Eva! You came!” Lily exclaimed happily.
“And she came and she came and she came, I’ll bet,” Belle added with a smirk, to which Lily smacked Belle’s upper arm.
“Welcome back, Eva,” Naimh said warmly.
But despite their friendly greetings, Eva still looked nervous as she came to a stop ten feet away from the table, looked all three of them in the eyes, and stated matter-of-factly, “I’m sorry for fucking Matty and then running. I got screwed up in the head a bit and wasn’t sure how to deal with it, so I did what I always do: I shut myself up in my room and tried to pretend nothing ever happened. After the first time I fucked him on Monday, I asked Matty to keep it a secret so I could get my head on straight and then kept hanging out with you guys acting like everything was normal. I do that. I did that after that party in the hills when I got drunk and made out with Matty a bunch of times. The next morning I pretended like it never happened and kinda… umm… lied about not remembering anything.”
My jaw dropped as I muttered, “Umm, what?”
“I’m sorry about that too, but it just goes to show I’m not very good at handling this kind of stuff,” Eva continued, barely missing a beat as she momentarily glanced at me before returning her attention to the girls. “I let my guard down – I did drink a helluva lot that night – and I woke up the next morning wishing I hadn’t. So I lied to you. I lied to myself. Tried to convince myself it wasn’t real.”
“Oh!” Naimh said in surprise as she processed that. “Umm… okay…”
“But the truth is that it really DID happen,” Eva rolled on, “and it happened because I was having FUN. That was the FIRST time I’d had fun in a long, long time. Dancing, drinking, that silly bounce house… the hunky guy everyone else was kissing, and I wanted to take my turn just like the rest of you. I was having fun with you: my friends. I don’t have many friends, but you all are very special people. And I’m sorry I let you down.”
Lily’s lower lip quivered, and she looked genuinely sympathetic as she looked back at the three of us.
“I need this group of friends,” Eva stated seriously. “I’m sorry I lied to you. I’m sorry I ran away from you. I’m NOT sorry about having sex with Matty because like… OMG… he’s freakin’ AMAZING.”
“Hear-hear!” Naimh cheered with a grin.
“Amazing,” Lily echoed.
“I can’t promise with absolute certainty I’ll never do it again – the lying part. The sex part, uhhh… I hope the rest of you wouldn’t mind if I didn’t stop. But I understand that lying doesn’t exactly endear me to my friends - both about not remembering the kisses as well as not admitting I’d seduced him for an entire week - so I’ll have to do a better job of not doing that if I want to continue being a part of The BTC,” Eva stated with her head nodding slowly, her eyes tight and her focus turned inward as if she’d rehearsed this entire thing and was trying desperately to not lose her script. “Because I DO want to be part of The BTC. I really do.”
“You ARE part of The BTC,” Naimh assured her. “Always have been.”
“I’m sorry for being a shitty friend up to this point, always closed off and a bit antisocial,” Eva stated with finality, her tone indicating that she was wrapping things up as she turned her gaze to me. “But I realize that college life is difficult enough on its own - and can only be harder if I’m alone. I don’t want to be alone anymore. I’ve made a decision to try and be a better friend to all of you. So… umm… yeah… Can… Can you please forgive me?”
Eva bit her lip nervously, shifted her weight onto her right hip, and hugged herself while dropping her chin down to her chest and studiously avoiding our eyes for the moment. And the longer we remained silent, the more wound up and tense she became.
“Of course we can forgive you,” Naimh stated first, her tone confident and poised. The rest of us all looked at her, including Eva, and my Irish girlfriend’s emerald-green eyes shone as she nodded firmly in confirmation to all of us before turning her attention to the hapa Hawaiian girl. “None of us is perfect, and we’ve all made mistakes. What makes The BTC so special is that we accept each other, forgive each other, and move on.”
By now I’d circled around the dining table to sit down next to Naimh. I placed my hand atop hers and gave it a reassuring squeeze while glancing up at my Irish girlfriend with a smile, and then turned my gaze back to Eva. “Lying about not remembering our kisses as a defense mechanism is really no big deal. I know what it’s like to make mistakes and wish they’d never happened. I’m sure we’ve all felt like that at one point or another.”
“For real,” Belle muttered a bit forlornly, exhaling a long sigh and then nodding as she fixed Eva with a serious look. “I, more than anyone else, know what it’s like to make the kind of mistake that can kill a friendship, only to have this group forgive me and welcome me back. Pretending you didn’t remember making out with Matty really isn’t a big deal. Having sex with Matty when… well… that’s exactly what I always wanted you to do… doesn’t require forgiveness in the first place. At best we can maybe get upset with you for holing yourself up in your room like a hermit instead of coming out to talk to us – but that’s actually a completely understandable reaction in my book.”
“Totally,” Lily stated with a nod. “I’ve locked myself in my bedroom refusing to come out or talk to anyone a few times, for far less serious stuff than this.”
“Well, she did miss your deflowering party,” Belle pointed out.
Naimh waggled her head and remarked, “Seems more of a punishment in and of itself.”
Belle and Lily giggled right along with Naimh. And then all three of them turned to face Eva again, who still looked apprehensive.
“You said you’re sorry, and that’s good enough for us,” Naimh pronounced, glancing at the rest of us for confirmation before turning back to face forward. “Welcome back to The BTC, Eva. We forgive you. And may we never speak of this stuff again.”
Eva blinked in surprise, looking at me and each of the girls one-by-one. “Really? That’s it?”
Naimh grinned. “That’s it. Unless you’d rather we come up with some kind of hazing ritual in penance in order to make you prove your--”
“No-no,” Eva interrupted. “I’m good.”
“Great then! Glad to know I’ve still got a drinkin’ buddy in the club who can (almost) keep up with me,” Naimh said playfully. She then gestured to the table and said, “Take a seat. Let’s eat.”
****
While the discussion of Eva’s re-admission to The BTC was concluded with minimal dispute, the post-dinner discussion about Sam’s “Head Girlfriend” status turned out to be far more… contentious.
First of all: Sam hadn’t come home yet, which seemed to further validate Belle’s position that Sam no longer deserved the title. Belle had called Sam and left her a voicemail prior to dinner for the sole purpose of getting Sam to come discuss Eva’s re-admission “in committee”. And I had also left Sam a voicemail asking her to come home so we could talk.
But she hadn’t replied to either voicemail, nor to my text asking her to check in. At that point I realized that I really should’ve gotten phone numbers from her Pre-Law classmates, just in case. As it was, I wound up feeling rather… anxious… telling myself that her lack of responsiveness was most likely because she was too busy to check her phone, and not that she was lying dead in a ditch somewhere.
It was because of Sam’s absence that I never intended to start a conversation about her suitability as “Head Girlfriend” in the first place. I mean yes, I’d told Naimh earlier today that she and I should talk to Sam about the whole “Head Girlfriend” thing, and maybe even do so tonight. But I certainly wasn’t expecting to walk out of the kitchen after having loaded up the dishwasher to find that all four of the other girls had started up a, well… a loaded conversation on that exact same topic without me.
“That’s exactly what I’ve been saying,” Belle contended in a heated tone as I joined the girls in the living room. “The BTC isn’t Sam’s priority anymore.”
“She never promised it would be,” Naimh pointed out, glancing up at me as I sat down beside her and rubbed her knee. She rubbed my hand atop her knee and then returned her attention to Belle and Lily on the opposite couch, with Eva in her usual armchair spot. “In fact: Sam stated the precise opposite. She made clear from the very beginning that her academics would come first.”
“You’re only proving my point regarding Sam’s unsuitability as ‘Head Girlfriend’,” Belle insisted while miming with air quotes. “If she wants to focus on her academics, that’s fine; that’s her prerogative. But she can’t expect us to let her continue being ‘Head’ anything if she won’t devote the necessary time and attention to us.”
“I think you’re losing sight of the topic,” Naimh stated reasonably, “and conflating Sam’s role as Head Girlfriend with her role as de facto leader of The BTC. Sam still loves Matty more than anything and he loves her - we can all see that - and just because she doesn’t hang out with us as much as she used to doesn’t make her unsuitable to be Matty’s Head Girlfriend.”
“Matty loves all of us, including Lily,” Belle argued.
“But he fell in love with Sam and named her his Head Girlfriend,” Naimh specified.
“How much do you wanna bet that was her idea to be ‘Head Girlfriend’ above the rest of us? We all know Sam’s competitive like that. Besides: that was then, this is now,” Belle retorted. “We’re not in high school anymore, and if you ask me: she doesn’t deserve that elevated honor anymore.”
“But nobody’s asking you,” Eva interjected, fiddling with her fingernails and shrugging dismissively. “You brought up this supposed ‘issue’ all on your own.”
“Don’t make me rescind my forgiveness for seducing Matty without us,” Belle growled with narrowed eyes at Eva.
“Hey… hey…” Lily soothed, rubbing Belle’s arm. “Don’t be catty. What happened with Eva and what’s happening with Sam aren’t related. We put Eva’s fears behind us, alright? And Neevie said, ‘May we never speak of them again.’ At the end of the day, we’re talking about Matty’s Head Girlfriend, aren’t we? It’s up to him to decide if Sam doesn’t deserve that title anymore.”
“Pssht, Matty’s not gonna break up with Sam over this,” Belle scoffed.
“Nobody said ‘break up’,” Naimh pointed out.
“Matty’s not gonna do anything to devalue his relationship with Sam,” Belle retorted.
“I agree,” Naimh stated. “So why are YOU trying to devalue his relationship with Sam? Is it that YOU want the title for yourself?”
“What? No! I don’t even want a regular girlfriend title!”
“Says the girl who immediately claimed to be Matty’s girlfriend the first day we met,” Eva drawled.
“Bitch, I swear if you open your mo-- OWW!” Belle’s venomous retort abruptly cut off when she had to whirl around in response to Lily pinching her arm.
“Belle… really… please?” I asked in a soothing voice, gesturing with both hands for her to take things down a notch.
Belle sighed at me and then glanced around at all three girls, shaking her head with tight eyes and a frustrated look on her face. “I’m just trying to look out for Matty’s best interests, alright? I love that he’s so devoted to adapting to whatever we need, but if he won’t stand up for himself on this issue with Sam, then somebody’s gotta do it!”
Lily turned to face me. “Do you feel like there’s an issue between you and Sam?”
“Yeah…” Eva added, sitting up a little straighter and focusing her attention on me. “Why the fuck are we arguing about Sam and Matty’s relationship instead of getting the information straight from one of the vested parties?”
I took a deep breath and glanced at Naimh before rubbing her knee again. The girls let me have a few moments to collect my thoughts, and then I surveyed all of them before speaking. “In plain simple fact: I DID know what I was getting into with Sam and her career-oriented focus. Would I like her to spend more quality time with me? Of course. But we’re now two months into school and I can’t honestly say I didn’t expect things to be this way. Do I love her any less for her absence? Not at all. It just makes me appreciate the limited time we have when we have it.”
“So there, it’s settled,” Naimh pronounced. “Nothing changes. Sam’s still Matty’s Head Girlfriend.”
“Well, actually…” I began, much to her surprise. And when my Irish girlfriend turned her gaze back to me, I gave her a small nod and asked, “Remember what we talked about this afternoon?”
Naimh’s green eyes narrowed. “I told you I don’t want you handing me the ‘Head Girlfriend’ title just because Sam’s too busy for you.”
“Ooh, that’s a good idea, actually,” Belle chirped.
The redhead immediately shook her red-haired head and held both hands up. “Sam’s your Head Girlfriend and I’m totally at peace with that.”
“I love that girl,” Belle drawled in a tone that was the opposite of love, “but Sam doesn’t deserve the title anymore,”
“Didn’t we resolve five seconds ago that so long as Matty is good with Sam being his Head Girlfriend, then Sam’s his Head Girlfriend?” Lily spoke up.
“I wanna hear what Matty meant by, ‘Well, actually…’” Eva interjected.
All four girls turned their focus to me.
I looked back at all four of them, spread out my hands, and said plainly, “I told Neevie that I don’t think anybody should be Head Girlfriend, including Sam. Belle called it an ‘elevated honor’. Neevie said she felt envious about me falling in love with Sam in high school while being prepared to let her go off to UCLA as ‘just friends’. I have independent relationships with ALL of you, including Eva. And I don’t want to cheapen those relationships by implying they’re any less important to me than my relationship with Sam.”
“Have you told Sam all this?” Eva queried.
I sighed. “The idea was to talk to her tonight. But obviously--”
“--obviously she’s not here,” Belle continued for me. “Let’s all just let that sink in: Sam’s. Not. Here. Again.” The petite pixie gestured around the room as if to plainly demonstrate Sam’s lack of presence.
“She’s busy,” I muttered.
“She’s choosing to make clear that she’s too busy for YOU. She’s too busy for US,” Belle scoffed. “Now granted, this wasn’t a Code Blue situation, so it’s not like we insisted she drop everything and race over here, but still. I told her plainly on the voicemail that Eva was back and that we collectively needed to be together to discuss the situation in committee, but noooo. She couldn’t be bothered.”
“And now you’re back to conflating Sam’s role as Head Girlfriend with her role as de facto leader of The BTC,” Naimh pointed out.
“You know what? Yes. Let’s conflate the two, because they’re pretty much interrelated,” Belle stated to Naimh rather hotly. “You’re his girlfriend, Lily’s his girlfriend, I do admit I’m functionally his girlfriend, and Eva’s… well I don’t know what the fuck you two call each other at the moment. Ku’uipo 2.0?”
“B…” I drawled with a sigh.
“Sam’s ‘Head Girlfriend’ title not only categorizes her as your primary romantic interest - the one who holds your elbow when we’re all out together as a group and gets to sit shotgun in the minivan - but ALSO as leader of The BTC,” Belle insisted. “And I say she doesn’t deserve either.”
“And you’re perfectly willing to say all this to her face?” Eva queried.
“Damn straight I am,” Belle confirmed. “You may not know me as well as the others do, but I’ve never been afraid to tell my friends what I really think.”
Eva raised her hands. “I can totally see that.”
“I think we need to revisit the idea of Neevie being Head Girlfriend,” Belle continued, raising her hand. “All in favor?”
Lily’s hand went up alongside Belle’s.
“Put your hands down,” I muttered. “This isn’t a vote. I told you: I don’t think anybody should be Head Girlfriend.”
“I don’t want the title anyways,” Naimh stated, shaking her head.
“But you’re perfect for it,” Belle insisted. “Who planned that amazing beach trip? You. Who has the best ideas? You. Who’s always working so hard to make sure everyone’s getting along and that The BTC is working together in harmony? You.”
“Sam’s a natural leader who’s guided us for so long and--”
“And that was then, but this is now,” Belle cut her off. “We’re not in high school anymore.”
Naimh gestured forward. “I’m not a natural leader. I can’t even win an argument with you.”
Belle shook her head and stated firmly, “Being a great leader isn’t about having the most forceful personality or winning all the arguments because you’re the most stubborn bitch about it.”
“Clearly,” Eva drawled. “Otherwise you’d be The BTC’s de facto leader, Belle.”
“Totally agree with you for once.” Belle smirked at Eva before returning her attention to Naimh. “Sam is a natural leader. I’ll be the first one to say Sam’s pretty awesome, and I really do love her, and she did a GREAT job of leading The BTC all throughout high school. She kept us together through thick and thin and all the drama and heartache of The Rule and the seven of us - ultimately eight of us, including Holly - exploring sex and love and me being a selfish bitch and Matty being pulled in a half-dozen different directions by clingy girls still trying to sort out their complicated feelings for him and so on and so on. We grew up from little girls to young women under Sam’s stewardship, and I wouldn’t be the person I am today without her.”
Belle glanced around at me, at Lily, at Eva, and then finally back to Naimh.
“But that was then, and this is now,” Belle stated firmly, repeatedly jabbing her right index finger into her open left palm. “Sam’s. Not. HERE. Anymore. You should be Head Girlfriend now, Neevie. And I honestly think that if Sam WAS here to listen to all of us discussing the subject, she’d agree with me.”
“She IS here,” Sam announced from right behind us, and we all whirled around to look back towards the hallway.
“Sam!” Belle exclaimed in surprise, blushing pink like a kid caught with her hand in the cookie jar.
“Relax, B, relax,” Sam said lightly with a warm smile, although her eyes looked weary and worn. “Sam DOES agree with you: Neevie should be Head Girlfriend. I think that would be perfect.”
“All in favor?” Belle asked, having quickly recovered. She sat up straight with a twinkle in her eye as she raised her hand into the air.
Sam raised her hand.
Lily raised her hand next to Belle’s.
And after a moment’s thought, Eva raised her hand as well.
Naimh looked at me nervously, waiting to see what I’d do.
After only a moment’s thought, I chuckled and nodded firmly while raising one hand. At the same time, I wrapped my other arm around my new Head Girlfriend to pull her close and give her a sweet kiss.
Sam grinned. “The motion passes.”
****
“Ohmigawd… I feel like that day lasted forever,” I groaned while sliding into bed at the end of the night with my new Head Girlfriend. I’d been woken early this morning to find my newest girlfriend (lowercase) giving me an alarm clock blowjob and teaching me two more Hawaiian phrases for my mental dictionary. These girls were really stretching the limits of my polyglot capabilities. But after filling my lovely, loquacious Lily’s lubricated love-tunnel with all my liquid love, it felt a bit like the day had gone entirely downhill from there.
Sam had been particularly cranky this morning and then stormed out of the house barking at me to make my own “fuckin’ brekkie”. Belle had admitted she felt envious of Lily’s ability to take my massive monster with ease, fuck my brains out all weekend, and skip off to class as fresh as a daisy. Naimh had felt depressed about being lonely. And then after all that, Eva returned to my doorstep after spending all weekend avoiding us, necessitating another long conversation.
And that doesn’t even mention the drama of this evening’s “Head Girlfriend” discussion that somehow required a comprehensive recap of all the pertinent facts for Sam’s edification subsequent to her arrival.
I was pretty talked out.
Thankfully, my new Head Girlfriend seemed to sense that I wasn’t in the mood for any further conversation as she wordlessly slid into bed alongside me. We were alone tonight. Lily and Eva had both gone home to Mrs. Morris’s house, tonight being Lily’s first night sleeping in her own bed since Thursday. Belle was across the hallway in her own bedroom.
And Sam was downstairs in her own bedroom.
I didn’t like the idea of Sam being downstairs in her own bedroom.
It made logical sense that Naimh and I were alone tonight. The girls thought it only fitting that Naimh and I should have this time together one-on-one to cement her new “elevated honor”, even if Naimh herself didn’t really want to consider herself elevated above the rest. Everyone had agreed, including me. And Sam had given me a sweet kiss before departing, murmuring a reminder that this didn’t mean she loved me any less.
But I still didn’t like the idea of Sam being downstairs in her own bedroom.
I mean, I understood it. The group had come to a collective decision, and regardless of the term “Matty’s Head Girlfriend” supposedly categorizing Naimh as my primary romantic interest, we all DID agree that the title also reflected her new role as The BTC’s new leader. Naimh had the bandwidth to focus on the group - and on me - while Sam did not: simple as that.
And yet I couldn’t help but feel that I still wanted more Sam in my life, not less.
It had already been said time and time again by Sam, Naimh, and even myself: I knew what I was getting into. I knew Sam would be busy. Zofi had warned me that Sam wasn’t yet ready to give me the kind of close-knit, intimate relationship I would want from her, and that she’d eventually decide I was a distraction she couldn’t afford and break up with me. Mother had told me to fight for Sam rather than let her leave me. Sam hadn’t actually tried to break up with me just yet, so therefore I didn’t actually need to fight for her.
And yet this felt like a step backwards all the same.
Naimh was right: I didn’t want to do anything to devalue my relationship with Sam, and whether or not The BTC had collectively agreed to make Naimh my Head Girlfriend instead of Sam, the removal of the title Sam had held since the end of high school still felt like…
…well, it felt like our relationship had less value than before.
It felt like we were giving up. It felt like Sam and I were looking at what it would take to keep our relationship going, what steps needed to be taken in order to make our relationship better, and had decided, ‘Nah. Too hard.’
I didn’t like the thought of giving up on her. I didn’t like the thought of giving up on US.
The situation was my fault, of course. I mean, I knew I shouldn’t be a martyr about it and fall on my sword, claiming a hundred percent responsibility or anything. But I knew that if I’d put my foot down and insisted that Sam continuing to be my Head Girlfriend was what I really wanted, I probably wouldn’t be in this situation right now.
But I hadn’t put my foot down. I’d raised my hand UP, actually, agreeing to the communal vote that Naimh should be my new Head Girlfriend.
I rationalized that decision in my head saying it was more about letting Naimh take the mantle of leadership over the club than about which of the girls in my life was my romantic primary.
But in plain simple fact: the vote ALSO was about which of the girls in my life was my romantic primary.
And that decision was also my fault.
Because I DID want Naimh to be more of a romantic focus in my life. I’d told her as such this afternoon when I first suggested we talk to Sam about the whole ‘Head Girlfriend’ thing. Naimh had been an amazing girlfriend ever since we’d all come to Berkeley, and she’d been an amazing girlfriend for a long while before that too. I DID love her. I DID want to explore more about what we could truly mean to each other. I DID believe she deserved a second chance after our first relationship had fallen apart.
But I still felt a sense of loss at the idea of Naimh’s future growth in my emotional life coming at the expense of Sam’s place in my heart.
I didn’t like the idea of Sam being downstairs in her own bedroom.
And that’s when Naimh slipped out of bed.
I’d been lying flat on my back, staring at the ceiling but not really seeing it. My Irish Head Girlfriend had been pillowing her copper-haired head on my chest and snuggling up against my side, idly running her fingers across my chest while studying my face. But without a word of warning or explanation, she got up and had opened my bedroom door before it even registered that she was no longer in my arms. And I only had time for a confused, “Where are you going?” before she disappeared out the door.
I frowned but waited patiently, certain that my new Head Girlfriend would shortly return. Perhaps she was going to her room to change into some slinky, sexy lingerie: the kind with half-cups that didn’t quite cover her nipples and sheer, see-thru paneling on the panties that proved the carpet matched the drapes. After all, Naimh’s typical method for curing me of my brooding moods was to simply be the most gorgeous thing I’d ever seen and then either fuck my brains out, or let ME fuck HER brains out.
For some reason, it never occurred to me that she’d bring Sam up to my bedroom. The entire BTC had agreed that this night was for me and Naimh alone, right? So I sat up in surprise as Naimh marched back into the room quite literally prodding Sam ahead of her, citing sternly, “Head Girlfriend’s orders. You can’t say ‘no’.”
I felt suddenly afraid that Naimh would push the blonde into the room and then slam the door shut, leaving me and my ex-Head Girlfriend alone, so I blurted to the redhead, “Please don’t leave.”
“Relax, Matty,” Naimh reassured me, coming inside and then calmly closing the door behind her. “There’s plenty of room for the three of us in your bed tonight.”
“It’s a weeknight,” Sam sighed wearily, glancing behind her at Naimh. “I’ve got a lot on my plate, and I really don’t have the energy for another long conversation.”
“Neither do I,” I groaned my agreement.
“Then we won’t have a long conversation,” Naimh pronounced while sidling up directly behind Sam and reaching up to start rubbing the blonde girl’s shoulders. After only a second, she exclaimed, “Good lord, you’re tense! Matty, c’mere and take over.”
I arched an eyebrow but smiled as I slid out of bed, requiring no further encouragement to get my hands onto Sam’s body. As I did so, Naimh started tugging up the hem of the busty blonde’s nightie, clearly intent on removing the article completely.
Rather than resist, Sam merely smirked and took over taking off her own nightie before casually tossing it aside without hesitation or need for seduction. She wore no bra beneath and stood there in her panties, letting me have a long, lingering look at her ridonkulously majestic rack while she enjoyed my slack-jawed expression.
I think I actually drooled a little.
Sam’s bare breasts proved to be the ultimate ice-breaker, blanking my mind from the melancholy I’d been feeling before. She watched my approach the entire way, and even gave me a coy glance over her shoulder right before I raised my hands to start giving her a massage.
I started off slowly, focusing my fingers on her neck and upper shoulders at first. Sam moaned and dropped her chin down to her chest, allowing me unlimited access to her upper torso. The thought of having that access made me want to reach around and go honka-honka on her humongous hooters, but I resisted that impulse and ordered myself to concentrate on relaxing my girlfriend’s tense muscles.
I hadn’t forgotten this morning’s little tiff with my now ex-Head Girlfriend, and specifically recalled her warning me not to start thinking I could freely substitute in a random Monday night as a replacement for missing “Sam Saturday”. I also remembered insisting that I’d be happy to give her a full-body massage to help her relax and get a better night’s sleep, and I damn well intended to do that.
So with that in mind, I gently nudged Sam forward towards the bed, grabbed one of the pillows for chest support, and helped guide her into a sideways position across the mattress so that her face could hang over the left edge while her feet trailed towards the right edge. That gave me full access to the length of her back, with only her panties in the way, which barely constituted more than a scrap of fabric that did a woefully poor job of containing the abundant flesh of her bubble butt.
Meanwhile, Naimh had circled around us to climb back onto the bed. She sat up against the headboard, her right leg folded but her left knee up. She draped her left forearm atop her knee and briefly ran her hand through her hair over the top of her head to brush all of her long, copper-red locks back from her freckled face. And she gave us both a warm, approving smile, feeling quite pleased with herself for putting me and Sam into this position tonight.
Nobody spoke for the next fifteen minutes. I wouldn’t say I ever really slacked off while giving the girls massages, and yet I would admit that there was a difference between a “routine weekday afternoon” backrub and an “I’m trying to remind you that I’ll love you for the rest of my life despite this kinda awkward thing we’re going through right now” full-body massage. I worked through my entire repertoire of techniques, supremely focused on Sam’s every moan, groan, and sigh. And by the time I was done, it was her turn to be slack-jawed and drooling a little.
To all outward appearances, Sam seemed to be asleep. I gazed down at her beautiful face and gently caressed her cheek before mentally chastising myself for orienting her the way I had. The face-down-at-the-edge-of-the-mattress position had proven well-suited for getting her to relax, but it would’ve been easier to let her sleep if she wasn’t right at the foot of the bed. I genuinely worried she might roll off.
But as it turned out, I was worried for nothing because she wasn’t quite asleep. Despite her eyes being closed, her mouth being open with a puddle of drool on the pillow, and her breathing being slow and steady, Sam still murmured, “Ineeyooenee…”
I blinked in surprise and leaned in closer, “I’m sorry. What was that?”
Her eyes remained closed, but she slurped up her drool, swallowed, and took a deep breath. And then in a slightly stronger voice, Sam murmured, “I need you in me, Matty…”
I popped my eyebrows and then glanced down at my pants. Despite my girlfriend’s fantastically near-naked body before me, I wasn’t hard in the slightest. Everything I did, I’d done for her relaxation, not to get her aroused.
But Sam squirmed a little restlessly, no longer completely at ease. She looked dazed and a bit delirious, lacking complete coordination. But there was no mistaking the way she tried, failed, and then re-attempted to hook her fingers into her panties and slowly work them down her hips.
Thinking quickly, I reached down to grab her panties with both hands and then gently but firmly dragged them over her bubble butt and then down and off her legs. I still wasn’t anywhere near erect, but realizing I had to do something while Sam rubbed her thighs together, trying to stimulate herself, I reached down with my right hand to insert first one, and then two fingers into her wet slit from between her thighs and then bring them out so I could rub my slickened fingertips against her clit.
“Nnnngggghhhh…” Sam groaned in response to my rubbing fingers, so I went back to collect more of her natural lubrication by plunging a third finger along with the first two inside of her steaming snatch, and then resumed my digital manipulation.
Naimh was suddenly next to me, dropping into a squat and dragging my pajama pants and boxers down with her. My previously limp dick had started to stiffen a little bit when I’d started fingering Sam, but it rapidly rose and hardened with each visible pulse of my quickening heartbeat in eager anticipation of feeling my personal redhead’s sweet sucking mouth surrounding its shaft.
It was my turn to groan, “Nnnngggghhhh…” as Naimh sealed her lips around the very base of my cock and slowly drew her head back, magically elongating my erection as she did so. She repeated the act a few more times, just enough to ensure I was hard enough for entry. And then she helped me step out of the clothes bunched up around my ankles as well as rip my shirt up and off my upper body for me so I could continue fingerbanging her fellow girlfriend for as long as possible.
And then it was time. Pulling my soaked digits from Sam’s saturated snatch, I slid her midsection a few more inches away from the foot of the bed, giving myself some room to park my knees to either side of her pressed-together legs. Taking hold of the prone blonde’s pelvis, I tilted her rump upwards in order to give myself a better angle for entry. And then holding my dick steady, I nestled my mushroom head into her folds and then progressively pushed, drilling my way down.
“Ohhhhhh…” Sam moaned as she felt herself get steadily filled up. Her hands had been hanging over the edge of the mattress, but she pulled them back just enough to bunch up the bed covers with her fingers until I’d finished my entrance. And then her hands relaxed once more, along with every other muscle in her body.
“Feel good?” Naimh asked lightly. “Feeling your man’s weight on top of you? Surrounding you with warmth? All while his gorgeous dick fills you up from the inside?”
“Nnnngggghhhh…” Sam groaned in lieu of an articulate response. The sound itself wasn’t particularly erotic, and yet spoke of a deep-rooted satisfaction that could only come from feeling utterly at peace.
I didn’t need to thrust in or out. Despite our two bodies being enjoined, the moment wasn’t particularly sexual. I knew I’d stay hard within my lover’s heavenly pussy for a long time. This was a time to enjoy our intimate embrace, and I nibbled and kissed my girlfriend’s shoulders and neck before lowering my head next to hers to nuzzle her cheek with my nose.
“I love you, Matty…” Sam murmured almost inaudibly, but just almost. Her eyes remained closed, and her face remained tilted downward over the edge, just out of my reach.
I meant to say, ‘I love you’ in response, but instead I wound up pleading, “Don’t leave me…”
Sam giggled lightly, replying, “I’m right here.”
Only then did I finally sigh, gently press my lips to her cheek, and murmur, “I love you too.”
Naimh, on the other hand, circled around to the side of the bed and knelt down beside Sam. From her vantage point, the redhead was able to lean over and kiss her fellow girlfriend’s lips, giving Sam a gentle kiss of friendship and love.
I saw Sam smile when Naimh pulled away, her eyes remaining closed. “Thank you, Neevie,” she murmured. “Thank you for bringing me up here tonight. I really needed this.”
“Anytime,” the Irish girl replied sweetly before adding in a stronger voice, “And I mean that: anytime. I know the group decided it was time for me to step up and take charge now, but you’ll always be Matty’s Head Girlfriend to me. It’s just that you’re like… taking a sabbatical. Or ‘Head Girlfriend Emerita’ or something. You’re busy now - we get that. But whenever time permits, your place is still by his side.”
Sam sighed and finally opened her eyes, looking straight at Naimh. “I’m sorry to put this on you.”
“There’s no need to be sorry,” Naimh reassured her. “I’m not afraid of taking charge a bit more. I rather enjoy thinking about The BTC as a whole, coming up with fun ideas, and making sure everyone’s getting along. And being Matty’s Head Girlfriend? It was something I always wanted but could never have taken away from you.”
“It’s something I should’ve given to you earlier. You’re ready. You’re more than ready. I know you’ll do a great job of looking after my girls… AND taking care of Matty.” Sam gave her a wry grin. “A key part of any management situation is succession planning. I always knew that if I wasn’t in charge, it would be you.”
“Management situations? Succession planning?” I muttered rather dubiously. “When did The BTC become a corporate entity?”
The girls both laughed, and Sam’s core muscles did delightful things to my dick, which made me grin as well.
Sam finished laughing with a long sigh. “I should’ve stepped down before we even got to Berkeley, really. I knew more than anyone how difficult this class schedule was going to be. I knew from the beginning this wasn’t going to be like high school. I just couldn’t let myself… I dunno… I couldn’t ‘quit’ the job, you know? It’s not in me to abdicate responsibility.”
“Then the rest of us should’ve stepped up sooner,” I spoke up, rubbing her arms. “You told me you hated feeling like you always needed to be in control, and being The BTC’s acknowledged leader was just one more burden to bear. Well this is one thing we could’ve done for you a long time ago - one burden we should’ve already taken off your shoulders.”
“You’re taking the burden off my shoulders now, and for that I’m ever grateful.” Sam hugged the pillow beneath her chest and shifted just a little bit so that her left cheek was supported on it. She smiled back at me, murmuring, “The BTC’s in good hands. Matty’s in good hands. I know you’ll take good care of him.”
Naimh glanced up at me with a grin, although she replied to Sam, “You know I will. I’ve loved him since the day we met.”
Sam chuckled, and for a moment she seemed to be at peace.
But then that moment passed, and I could see a trace of fear creeping into the corners of her eyes. So I quickly leaned down to kiss her again, murmuring, “Heyyy… relax. Everything’s changing, but at the same time nothing’s really changed. My love for you has never been based on titles. Whether you’re Head Girlfriend or not, I’ll always love Sam.”
“And will you still love me even if I spend even less time with you than I’ve been doing lately?”
“Absolutely. I made you a promise. Tomorrow, the day after, next week, next year: I’ll always be waiting for you right here whenever you have time to come back to me.”
“And if it’s four years from now? Or seven? Or fifteen?” Sam asked a little worriedly.
“I’ll wait a lifetime for you if I have to,” I assured her.
“We’ve been in love for less than a year. How can either of us possibly know we’ll still love each other a lifetime from now?”
I shrugged and kissed the back of her neck while slipping my left palm against the back of her left hand and then interlacing our fingers, giving them a squeeze. “Perhaps I can’t possibly know - but I have faith that our love will endure.”
Sam sighed and squeezed my fingers back. “You really mean that, don’t you? It’s so easy for you to have faith. Maybe I’m too much of a realist to do the same.”
I nuzzled the back of her neck with my nose and replied, “I can have faith enough for the both of us, but maybe you can let go just this once. Be the realist for all other things, but have faith in this one irrational truth and set it in your heart as your guiding star. Then you’ll know you can always find your way home.”
“You’ll really wait for me?”
I breathed into her ear, “Forever.”
“Matty, we’re still just kids,” Sam moaned. “What do teenagers know about forever?”
“Not a damn thing.”
“I want to believe.”
“Then believe.”
“It won’t be easy.”
“You’re worth it. And fortunately for me…” I reached out with my right hand to cup Naimh’s cheek and smile at her. “I won’t have to wait alone. That’s the great part of this relationship. You’re not flying off across the country with no idea what kind of girls I might meet and fall in love with. You’re simply letting yourself focus on the things you need to focus on, while entrusting me to the care of girls who love you and will most definitely share if and when you have more time to spend with us.”
“Seriously, you two are being far too melodramatic about this,” Naimh interjected, reaching up to tease Sam’s nose with her fingertip. “You’re not breaking up. You’re not moving out of the house. You’re still Matty’s girlfriend. We’re still gonna drag you away for group trips and have Friday orgies and watch Dawson’s Creek and-- Oh, shut it, Matty. It’s a great show.”
I stopped moaning and chuckled instead.
“The BTC will always be here when you need it,” Naimh assured her. “We’re Forever Friends… the operative word being Forever.”
“Forever,” Sam repeated with a smile, tasting the word on her lips.
“And you’ll always be Matty’s first,” Naimh stated supportively, without envy. “His first true love. His first Head Girlfriend. You’re his Aphrodite, remember? He will ALWAYS love you. Have faith in that.”
Sam’s left hand squeezed mine. Her right hand reached up to take Naimh’s and squeeze it as well. And with a contented sigh that exhaled all her doubts away, she turned and found my eyes.
“I do.”
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TABLE OF CONTENTS:
Prologue & Chapter 1: The BTC: https://www.patreon.com/posts/99290461
Chapter 2: Hoalauna: https://www.patreon.com/posts/99357682
Chapter 3: E10: https://www.patreon.com/posts/99433482
Chapter 4: Leeloo: https://www.patreon.com/posts/99506524
Chapter 5: The Fifth Element: https://www.patreon.com/posts/99618767
Chapter 6: Lily: https://www.patreon.com/posts/100326143
Chapter 7: The Hangover: https://www.patreon.com/posts/100548952
Chapter 8: Quality Time: https://www.patreon.com/posts/100806434
Chapter 9: The Favor: https://www.patreon.com/posts/101140618
Chapter 10: Ku’uipo: https://www.patreon.com/posts/101372817
Chapter 11: The R-word: https://www.patreon.com/posts/101672192
Chapter 12: The Beach: https://www.patreon.com/posts/101896200
Chapter 13: Into the Blue: https://www.patreon.com/posts/102179037
Chapter 14: Out of the Blue: https://www.patreon.com/posts/102357109
Chapter 15: Evelynn: https://www.patreon.com/posts/102690659
Chapter 16: Liliana: https://www.patreon.com/posts/102919229
Chapter 17: Envy: https://www.patreon.com/posts/103193408
Chapter 18: Eva: https://www.patreon.com/posts/103442618
