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BETTER OFF – Full Script
🕑 Added 2023-02-08 19:07:54 +0000 UTCHi, and thank you for your continued support during these slow times! I've continued to toil away on the story that I partially posted a while ago, and here it is: condensed, rearranged, revised over and over...and finally ready to be drawn as a gainer comic! This only contains the narration and dialogue, without any descriptions of what the art will depict–for now, I'll leave that to your horny imaginations. (You can probably deduce what's happening in each scene from the text. Another little clue: at one point pages stop containing two panels each and start being filled by larger illustrations. I wonder why that is?) As you can see, this will be the longest of my comic book projects, at 26 pages, but I'm pretty confident about it now that I have every detail fully mapped out. What's written here will be 99% the exact same as the resulting comic.
There's a couple of illustrations in the pipeline, and after that, we're off to page 1! See you very soon!
BETTER OFF
1: DIET
Page 1, Panel 1
NARRATION: Eddy’s calorie-counting ex demanded that he follow her diet. While they were together, he could only enjoy good food behind her back, going on guilty drive-through runs and keeping a secret candy drawer.
Page 1, Panel 2
NARRATION: In contrast, Kate, his amazing new girlfriend, couldn’t bear to see him hungry. She’d order, cook or bake at a moment’s notice to satisfy any of his cravings – even those he only mentioned in passing.
EDDY: (To himself) Ugh… My stomach can’t keep up – but this might only be a honeymoon phase thing, so I gotta make the most of it.
2: WARDROBE
Page 2, Panel 1
NARRATION: Eddy’s pretentious ex controlled his wardrobe. She threw out things he loved and made him buy preppy crap that matched her outfits. The worst of it was how she made him cover up the sweet tattoos he was so proud of.
Page 2, Panel 2
NARRATION: Surprisingly, Kate not only loved his ink and sports swag, but didn’t mind that he held on to clothes long after they grew snug on his softening body. By the time Eddy realized he needed to upsize, she’d learned his taste well enough to take care of it herself.
KATE: Everything’s a little larger than needed…in case things keep shrinking in the wash.
NARRATION: Content, Eddy never thought about shopping again.
3: BUDDIES
Page 3, Panel 1
NARRATION: Eddy’s social-climbing ex made him cut off his buddies, whom she called “embarrassing man-children”. She dragged him to boring parties where the food was bland and the servings tiny, and the people made him feel like trash.
Page 3, Panel 2
NARRATION: Conversely, Kate was thrilled to meet the old gang, and arranged their reunion herself.
EDDY: Can we… pant… take a breather?
TONY: C’mon, dude – you were supposed to be the lightest and fastest of us!
NARRATION: Shooting hoops wasn’t as fun as before…
Page 4, Panel 1
NARRATION: ...but it was still a joy to throw back a few beers, put meat on the grill and reminisce.
NARRATION: The boys were impressed by Eddy’s new capacity for food and drink – though not as impressed as they were by Kate’s looks, and her sweet laugh at their dumb jokes, and her waiting on Eddy hand and foot.
Page 4, Panel 2
NARRATION: It was such a good time that they started coming over every week. Eddy was as happy as a pig in mud – and the best part was that he didn’t need to leave the house for it to happen.
4: SPECIAL OCCASIONS
Page 5, Panel 1
NARRATION: Eddy’s conceited ex demanded elaborate surprises and expensive gifts on special occasions. Eddy put a ton of money and thought into them, but they never turned out to be what she wanted.
Page 5, Panel 2
NARRATION: On the other hand, Kate was so low-key that, even on birthdays and anniversaries, she thought it was enough for the two of them to go watch a movie and then eat, or see a game and then eat, or just go out to eat.
Page 6, Panel 1
NARRATION: In their second year of living together, she confessed she’d rather just cook dinner at home.
KATE: And do we have to dress up? I mean, why do we need to put on a show for each other?
Page 6, Panel 2
NARRATION: And that’s how Eddy came to spend important dates sitting in his gym shorts, plowing through the extravagant meals she’d come up with.
EDDY: (To himself) Works for me! Though the least I can do is show her how much I like it all…even if it’s too much for my gut to handle.
5: FLATULENCE
Page 7, Panel 1
NARRATION: Eddy’s controlling ex would always find out when he’d secretly indulged in takeout. The worst times were when his own body, unused to greasy food, betrayed him with flatulence in front of her.
Page 7, Panel 2
NARRATION: On the opposite end of things, Kate suggested Eddy pass gas whenever he whined about being too full at the table. But he was too embarrassed to take her up on it.
EDDY: What? I’m not gonna be gross like that in front of you!
KATE: Your tummy’s hella noisy anyway! And I know half your trips to the bathroom are just to burp and fart in secret.
Page 8, Panel 1
NARRATION: Eventually he yielded a timid belch into his fist. With a sigh of mock frustration, Kate kneeled in front of him and started massaging his gut.
EDDY: Hmm…How are your tiny hands so strong…? Urp – sorry… Oh, yeah…
NARRATION: Once she had him belching and tooting with abandon, she pushed his large thighs apart and leaned in…
Page 8, Panel 2
NARRATION: Along with the best climax of Eddy’s young life, Kate drew out of him a winding, rattling stinker like he’d never let out before.
KATE: Better?
EDDY: Pant…Better.
NARRATION: After that, he completely relaxed around her. The freedom to let it rip made it easier for Eddy to keep binging for longer. Kate never failed to stay ahead of his appetite.
6: PORN
Page 9, Panel 1
NARRATION: Eddy’s possessive ex didn’t want him watching porn. According to her, thinking of anyone else was cheating, and smut would give him gross ideas she didn’t want to hear of.
Page 9, Panel 2
NARRATION: Kate couldn’t be more different. From the start, she was open about everything she watched, from common kinks to real niche stuff. Eddy, who was pretty tame, appreciated her adventurous taste.
EDDY: Shit…! You’re a little pervert, aren’t you?
KATE: Worse than any guy I’ve known.
Page 10, Panel 1
NARRATION: Frisky time soon came to consist of watching stuff and lazily getting off together. Little by little, Eddy discovered new things he enjoyed – like smut with only dudes in it.
NARRATION: Specifically, dudes who looked like his friend Tony.
Page 10, Panel 2
NARRATION: Of the gang, Eddy and Tony were the closest. Tony sometimes came over alone, looking for company while he worked his remote 9-to-5. In thanks for being welcome, he’d treat his growing friend to lunch.
EDDY: Bwarp…! I don’t think I asked for this much, did I?
TONY: I may have added a lil’ extra. But I know how hungry you get these days, big guy.
Page 11, Panel 1
NARRATION: The boys had never outgrown roughhousing – but the larger Eddy got, the more often Tony’s hands reached for him, and the longer they lingered. At the same time, the beefcake was keenly aware of how ungainly his friend had become, and always helped him out.
TONY: I gotta come work here more often, if you need that much help getting your snacks!
NARRATION: Even when he teased Eddy, Tony’s love was unmistakable.
Page 11, Panel 2
NARRATION: And in spite of Tony’s best intentions, Kate was sure she’d spotted a few hard-ons.
KATE: I’m glad you stayed for dinner, but you didn’t have to make it yourself!
TONY: It’s no problem at all! Figured you could use a hand keeping our big boy topped off.
NARRATION: Truth was, she didn't mind at all. She kept finding smut with Tony look-alikes for her horny big guy, and decided she’d let things develop.
7: JOB
Page 12, Page 1
NARRATION: Eddy’s high-maintenance ex insisted that he stick to his boring, depressing, well-paying job.
Page 12, Page 2
NARRATION: Now, Kate made Eddy so happy that he could tolerate work. Except for the one day every month where he had to drag himself into the office, just because his contract said so.
NARRATION: Over time, he learned to ignore the questions about his health, and the eyes that bulged at his wide, slow-moving form. But just as his skin thickened, accommodations grew narrow, driving and waddling became tiring, and eating “normally” turned impossible.
Page 13
NARRATION: Finally, on the morning of another in-office day, Eddy told Kate he was done. She leaped at the chance to support him.
KATE: Of course! You could look for something else, or go back to school… Take as long as you need!
NARRATION: As usual, they didn’t bring up Kate’s trust fund, nor the fact that she owned their house. They liked pretending they stood on equal ground.
Page 14
NARRATION: He didn’t look into new jobs or a new career, and Kate didn’t put any pressure on him. He did the same things he did whenever he was off work, only all the time now: watching TV, playing games and eating. Tony kept coming over as if nothing had changed.
KATE: You want me to bring lunch over there, sweetie? You look so comfy…
EDDY: Uh, sure… Brrraaaapp! I mean, if you don’t mind…
TONY: You sure about that, big buddy? You’ve barely moved all day!
8: DECOR
Page 15, Panel 1
NARRATION: Eddy’s ostentatious ex chose every piece of furniture and decor in their apartment, to the point where he didn’t feel comfortable in it nor represented by it.
Page 15, Panel 2
NARRATION: By contrast, Kate’s only demand was to put up as many photos of the two as possible, in every room of the house – from the first one they took to others only days old.
KATE: What can I say? I just like sharing our story with every guest who comes over!
Page 16
NARRATION: Besides that, she only cared about Eddy’s comfort. She replaced stylish furniture with extra-wide, specially-reinforced pieces; had doorways widened; installed ceiling-bound chains and railings to help him move; bought rolling carts for his food…
EDDY: (To himself) Not what I would’ve called my dream home – but you gotta love when a place is all about you!
Page 17
NARRATION: Not even the bathrooms escaped the spread of Eddy’s presence: the enormous toilets and bathtubs bore padded rims and mobility handles, and stuffed mini-fridges kept him busy as he tended to his needs.
TONY: I gotta tell ya, only a real pig can keep stuffing his face in this smell.
9: GROOMING
Page 18, Panel 1
NARRATION: Eddy’s vain ex spent a lot of his money at salons and spas, but still made him learn the basics of her beauty regime, in case she found herself in a pinch.
NARRATION: Kate was touched when he offered his skills early in their relationship, but never took him up on it. She was always radiant, of course, but did it by her own hand and with her own money.
Page 18, Panel 2
NARRATION: Instead, she took charge of Eddy’s grooming as soon as he moved in–starting with his hair and beard, and over time including his hands, feet, nose hair, skin…She was always tender and playful, and every time he felt not only refreshed, but also wanted and cared for.
Page 19
NARRATION: Things escalated so organically that Eddy only felt a little self-conscious when she started applying ointments and powder between his rolls, and when she first offered to bathe him…
EDDY: Heh, it kinda tickles… Say, we got any more of these pastries, babe?
Page 20
NARRATION: …and didn’t even blink when she announced she needed help bathing him. Tony, who at this point visited most days, and who’d spontaneously started helping Eddy in the toilet, was happy to jump in.
TONY: Whaddaya mean, “imposition”? This is hella fun! Everywhere I touch, it’s like he’s all made of boob!
10: OPEN
Page 21, Panel 1
NARRATION: The only time Eddy brought up the idea of an open relationship, his ex cried and accused him of wanting to leave her–and immediately confessed to all the times she’d cheated. Eddy moved out the next day, relieved he’d never proposed.
NARRATION: On their first night together, he told Kate he wasn’t hung up on monogamy, but he wanted honesty.
EDDY: Like, if I can’t meet your needs, or vice versa, I wanna talk about it, y’know?
Page 21, Panel 2
NARRATION: The issue didn’t come up for years. They didn’t notice when Eddy got too fat to fuck because frisky time had become lazy as hell way earlier. But past a certain point, even what they did became impossible.
EDDY: You can’t reach…and I can’t reach…Maybe if my gut–wheeze–wasn’t so full and heavy–bwoarp–I could help a bit more?
KATE: And how long would you have to starve for that? No way, baby.
Page 22
NARRATION: By then, Tony had become essential to Eddy’s care. He spent most nights in the guest room, to make sure he was available when needed, and his relentless hard-on had become a running joke. In private, horny Eddy had admitted to Kate that he enjoyed his friend’s strong hands on his lard. And so, one day during bath time, Eddy reached out…
TONY: Oof…Are you sure, big guy? I for fucking sure want this, but things will change…
Page 23
NARRATION: And change they did. Tony moved in permanently, bringing only his clothes and exercise gear...and all of his cooking appliances. He and Kate had the kitchen doubled in size, storage capacity and productive capability.
NARRATION: Kate had been happy to nudge Eddy’s appetite into spiraling over time, but the brash weightlifter brought a competitive edge to his helpless buddy’s overfeeding.
EDDY: Bwwwoooaaarrrppp!! Urgh…No more…
TONY: C’mon, big buddy–we put so much love into this! Open wide for me, will ya?
Page 24
NARRATION: On sunny weekends, he’d tow the groaning butterball to the backyard, coat him in sunblock, and get the grill going. The boys came over with booze and obscene amounts of takeout, and made fun of what a trainwreck poor Eddy had become.
EDDY: Please…Brrrwwwaaappp!!! Gonna…Hurk…Explode…
KATE: Who wants dessert? I might’ve made too much, but you’ll take care of it, right, baby?
Page 25
NARRATION: It might’ve sounded like the opposite, but Eddy never regretted anything. Tony was forceful but tender, demanding but thoughtful. The feeling of his ever-warm muscles pressed against Eddy’s yielding mass would send the pinned-down behemoth soaring, his overburdened heart racing.
TONY: If you wanna get off, y’know what to do, handsome. Lemme hear you say it.
EDDY: I’m–bwwwooorrrppp–starvin’–gasp–daddy…
Page 26
NARRATION: It was Kate, however, who suggested the thing that really spiced things up–something that both Tony and Eddy desperately wanted, but didn’t dare ask for.
EDDY: (To himself) At this rate, I’m sure even Tony’s muscles won’t be able to handle my fat forever. I’m down to invite someone new into our little family–though, the way I’m pushing my ticker these days, I probably shouldn’t be getting off anymore, anyway. So long as they don’t take my grub, I’m happy!
