Azazyel
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Mountain God Chapter 43
🕑 Added 2023-04-27 09:16:05 +0000 UTCHonestly, if half the meetings I was 'forced' into weren't just funny as hell, I might have gotten irritated and started throwing divine lightning around at the self-important people who thought themselves better than a literal god.
But not all meetings were pleasant nor in any way funny... "Down to the Rancor pit with you." I said bluntly pulling a lever beside my throne and the Satanic cultist fell down the chute that opened up beneath his feet with him screaming as he was sucked into the pit of lava below at the end of the tunnel as I focused on the other two members of some satanic cult that decided to do stupid shit to get my attention.
"I have no interest in bringing your version of 'Satan' to life... And sacrificing handsome and adorable mountain goats most certainly doesn't get my damned favor." I spoke dully before focusing a bit. "Why the hell do you even want Satan anyway, you dumbasses literally have Sirzechs, the new Lucifer?" I asked exasperated at this damned meeting and even fucking worse I could feel Sakuya's scowl at the sight of the mountain goats blood covering the fucking ground from the 'surprise' sacrifice to me.
Honestly, the goats were nice looking and I was kinda interested in keeping them for a mascot or something but then the dumbass whipped out a cleaver and just killed them... When I didn't even ask what they even wanted, they just sacrificed the goat and then began pleading me to bring about the true Satan that will usher in the world of darkness or some nonsense.
"The pretender Lucifer is just that a pretender! Not only is he a weak-willed sis-con who can be pushed around but we don't want Lucifer returned we desire a true tyrant that will bring about armageddon!" The cultist shouted with fanatical worship coming into his tone and I just flatly stared at the two before my head slowly turned to Sakuya as I spoke.
"Sakuya, I am a strong defender of humanity... I love, care for, protect, and help them realize their potential." I looked at the two dumbasses in front of me. "These idiots have lost their humanity card in wanting to usher in some kind of apocalypse so get rid of them. And if Remillia and Flandre are hungry they can have them." I said bluntly feeling no shame at the sheer revolting sight of the two's minds and souls that I could see with my divine senses.
As the two reached for wicked curved daggers to defend themselves their forms slowed down to a crawl with Sakuya casually walking forward and with a crunching noise she dealt with them quick and painlessly by stabbing her daggers up through the base of the back of their necks and into their brains.
"Damned Cultists... Do I need to put up a sign saying 'No reviving evil gods here'. Sakuya you are a dear." I said smiling wryly as she time-skipped the bodies out of my cathedral and within that time skip cleaned up the mountain goats making me groan at how stupid people could be.
"Yes, Moria what would you do without me." Sakuya retorted jokingly with a soft smile as she leaned against the side of my throne.
"I would have kidnapped you after looking into other timelines after seeing how you make my life possible." I joked putting on a blunt matter-of-fact face and she rolled her eyes but she still patted my shoulder as she spoke.
"Either way those two are dealt with, and I took the liberty of canceling the rest of your meetings today except for the meeting with the Church exorcists that are carrying a message they are bound to give you in person. Saluya finished and I nodded with a sigh.
"Alright send them in... I will just go drink with Yuyuko Saigyouji to drown out that last meeting." I said dryly with Sakuya shrugging and time skipping away to the front of my cathedral where Tenma was keeping my two Church guests in place.
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A couple of minutes later Tenma and Sakuya escorted the church guests within my throne room and although I couldn't recognize the older woman leading the duo but I did recognize Xenovia Quarta with her large bound sword strapped to her back that I believed to be Excalibur Destruction possibly.
"Xenovia stay here. The words spoken between the Church and the pagan god Moria are not for lower ranked church members." The woman spoke and I saw she was a woman seemingly in her late twenties early thirties maybe, with a voluptuous frame that wasn't at all hidden with her tight-fitting nun outfit. Then as Xenovia reluctantly nodded and went to stand outside the door I saw the woman had blond hair and blue eyes with some kind of northern Europe heritage.
"You know calling a god a mere 'pagan' is rather rude," I spoke softly but she didn't falter or flinch, only pulling her nun habit aside a bit and my lips twitched seeing her reach into her titty pocket dimension to bring out a large manilla folder.
"Moria the church is curious and worried about your actions in giving humanity so many tools in which to gain power. Beyond that we were curious if you would be willing to visit Heaven as the Angels of the Holy Father and our Lord himself wishes to meet you." The woman spoke and I raised an eyebrow before breaking into laughter with Sakuya tensing beside me as the woman's blue eyes tightened on me.
"Me giving humans power? How is that so bad? Is it bad I made the power inside the person and made sure devils couldn't force them into a peerage or likewise have their special powers extracted like a sacred gear remover?" I asked rhetorically chuckling all the while. "Oh and the angels and god wants to meet me in Heaven?" I said drawing out the word god as I leaned forward a bit.
"The Abrahamic god is dead... Let's just get that into the open, not only is god dead but heaven is breaking down without any divinity fueling the dimension." I continued and the woman tensed and I realized what her name was as I made the connection to Xenovia after I whimsically decided to check her own profile in my system.
"So Griselda Quarta... The heavens realize they are fucked and are coming to me to fuel their heaven correct?" I asked and then Ea spun to life beside me as though sensing my tension as I whispered. "I truly hope you idiots were stupid enough to think you could seal me up as the Shinto did to my just-born sibling..." I drawled and Griselda didn't even flinch as she responded.
"That option was discussed briefly but seeing you provide an elevation for all of pure humanity and supply all of said humanity and that new realm of Orario with infinite power as far as we could tell, the idea never made it past three sentences of possibilities to entrap you with fueling or fixing Heaven." She said bluntly and I shrugged at that honestly feeling a bit better about her for being honest.
If I hated everyone that wanted to use my infinite power I would literally end up hating everyone so I just chilled out a bit on that so long as they didn't show any signs of acting on those concerns.
"Alright so now that the games are done with. What do you want?" I asked plainly with a genial smile and then as she spoke I closed my eyes before covering my face with my hands as she continued to speak.
"Lady Gabriel has offered to marry you and devote her heart to you. If you retrieve the spark of Yaweh's soul within the True Longinus and build the Abrahamic God a new body with all your efforts for our god to be revived within." Griselda spoke clearly and I just wanted to teleport her into the damned sun...
Bringing Timmy's adorable husky back to life after it got run over by a car was one thing. Bringing the fucking Christian God back to life...
"Fuck it. I don't wanna be stuck dealing with Trihexia so let's do it Haha." I said with a wry smile. Sure the marriage with Gabriel was ehhhh. Or just weird but having the most beautiful angel of Heaven acting as a housewife was too entertaining of a thought to ignore.
And if I stick the pure energy soul form of God inside a very female form. That itself was worth all the trouble.
Comments
Wrath of Vajra
Thats just taking "bruh!?" On an omnipotent level right there.
Gilgamos
Latest trashy manga 😂
Wrath of Vajra
The True Longinus, the Arc of the Covenant, and last, but most certainly not least, the Crown of Thorns. Gather these three components together and you just might have yourself a revived God of gods, so long as you've done it near Yahwes white throne of course as an extra safety precaution.
Laplase
Put some fail safes in and maybe get Tiamama's involved for some laughs.
Nile Oplas
Well Cao Cao and Indra ain't gonna have a good time then; Moria's gonna steal or use Indra's treasures for the resurrection ain't he?
Angel
Is it wrong to seduce God after i brought him back to life as a woman
Azazyel
"Hey boyz, it's your momma Tripple G! And today I am going to spear this dumbass dragon and shove it's soul into a glove!"
ieatstars
Just a thought but it’d be funny if after coming back to life God just ditches heaven and becomes a dungeon diver streamer lol
