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[D'sP] I'm Going To Cheat - Chapter 462
🕑 Added 2025-08-01 18:21:38 +0000 UTCDoyle turns back to the “Matriarch Stratus Cloud Cyclone Goat” that was now the boss of floor 20. And it wandered off to graze nearby.
Ally laughs, ‘Fair enough. I guess a goat with a mind is going to be different from a kobold or myconid.’
Doyle is a bit distracted but offhandly adds, ‘Or an ant’, then goes back to taking in his new monster. He had gotten a decent look while she was evolving, but now the details came into focus.
Her horns didn’t look like mithril carved into the shape of horns. Rather, while taking on the look and qualities of mithril, Doyle could now tell that the horns were still organic. In fact, her entire body, despite the metallic look, is organic. He isn’t sure how this will affect things, though at the very least, the dungeon now has its own version of a “golden fleece”.
More than that, because her fur isn’t made of metal, it is closer in feel to actual wool. Actually, because of another of her aspects, it seems the fur is actually further away from metal than a regular goat’s fur. Because she is FLUFFY. Like a cloud.
Ally is a big fan of this, already having flown over and flopped down on the bosses back. Ally sighs contentedly, ‘Can we keep this floor as the last one for a while?’
Doyle laughs, ‘That may or may not be in the cards, but we can certainly ask her for some of her fur to improve your bed. Now, while you’re there, can you describe how it feels? Because that sure looks like steel wool, if of a different color. Well, except it actually looks like wool except someone textured it? What’s up with that?’
Ally snuggles in deeper, ‘The wonders of magic! O-metals, organic metals, show up commonly enough that it isn’t any big secret or anything. If anything, the category is too broad. Just assume that until you mess with it, the metal fur will act and feel like fur, but resist things as if it was metal. Sort of an oobleck style situation, except based on intent and her wishes.’
Doyle, ‘So she’ll be a popular boss? I assume her fur will make for great cloth armor.’
Ally nods, ‘Basically that. Though since it was only slightly made of mithril, we’re looking more at gear for martial artists than mage robes.’
Doyle returns to examining the new boss. Though there isn’t all that much more to see. Since the horns are now o-metal instead of covers, he can’t tell if they’ll act as a staff-style implement. In fact, he is pretty certain they won’t.
Besides that, this change was likely the most advantageous for the hooves. Doyle hadn’t really solved hoof armor for a goats split hoof and so simply turning them into metal? Much more elegant of a solution. Though that brings up further questions. ‘Can they smelt the metal out of her hooves or fur?’
Ally, ‘Maybe? Like I said, the category of o-metal is too broad. If I had to guess; the hooves, horns, and likely bones can be smelted for mithril. On the other hand, the fur is more likely to burn. Though I’m just guessing based on which material they’re closer to. It is entirely possible that once sheared, the fur melts like candyfloss the second it gets up to temp.’
Doyle, ‘Candy floss?’
Ally raises an eyebrow, ‘That’s what you’re questioning? Anyway, I prefer the term after being on your old Internet for a while. Besides, cotton candy felt a little too on the nose.’
Doyle tilts back, ‘I guess I have heard it called that.’
Ally, ‘Anyway, the main defining characteristic of an o-metal is that it is alive while being grown.’
Doyle, ‘But hair isn’t exactly alive?’
Ally, ‘That is why I specified “while being grown”. Because animals, even without magic, use biometals. As in, metals that are just a part of your biology. Which you already know if you think about it for a second. After all, human blood has iron and so on. Though even beyond that, I know there were snails which basically made their shells out of metal on your planet even before magic.
‘Organic metals, on the other hand, are where magic meets biology and makes puppy kittens. It is literally a metal that is organic. Yes, under pre-magic definitions, that is impossible. Magic doesn’t care. This wonderful fur is fully metal and completely organic. Not just fur with metal bonded to it.’
Doyle sighs, ‘Right, magic. I should check my common sense at the door.’
Ally laughs, ‘You don’t need to go that far. Pre-magic physics weren’t wrong. It isn’t like we are in one of those dimensions where magic is the base. Your world’s understanding of physics still applies. The difference is that magic can modify them at a cost.
‘That cost can be relatively cheap. A message spell that technically breaks the speed of light is cheap because it is only transferring information, though the cost can scale if the distance being covered grows too great. Trying to use magic to pull matter out of a black hole is going to take god-like power as black holes and other similar “absolute” manifestations of reality are about as hard physics as you can get.’
Doyle nods, ‘Fair enough. Now to introduce our boss here to her minions and herd.’
Ally frowns, ‘That does bring up a question. How are you going to integrate her into the power structure? Like, she can’t talk. So how will it work with the kobolds? Because it isn’t like they can lead her.’
Doyle, ‘Well, I was going to take a page out of Moota’s life. She grew up being worshipped for her abilities and basically just left to graze. I figure we can position our Matriarch here in a similar situation.
‘The kobolds will, maybe not “worship” as that would likely get uncomfortable for her, but at the very least look to her in veneration. So she won’t command them and they won’t command her, but they’ll take cues from each other.’
Ally stretches and yawns. ‘Hmm, that should work.’
Doyle, ‘Okay, now let’s introduce the kobolds to their new source of inspiration and motivation.’
Now, normally Doyle would just portal the goat right over to where he wanted her. A convenient use of the fact that no delvers are on the floor. However, he let the goat take the slow route this time as Ally seemed to really enjoy laying there. Not that the path between the farm area and the floor proper is ever that far off a path. After all, when a floor is cleared, Doyle tries to make sure monsters are back in place as quickly as possible. Even though that has become less of a necessity ever since “instances” got improved.
Eventually though, the goat had to arrive and so Ally got up and returned to her room for the moment.
Now, Doyle hadn’t specifically ordered his monsters to follow his bosses so far, and wasn’t planning to start beyond a few nudges. Though he decided to keep a close watch on how the relationship worked out.
The matriarch easily finds the cyclone goats and there isn’t really any question about her taking over.
Now, since Doyle had somewhat primed the kobolds, they let it happen, standing back and watching. Except then the matriarch took offense to something. Specifically, the kobolds built a bit of a fence around the herds grazing area. She did not like this and started kicking the wooden posts over.
Which, given her Strength? Yeah, those poles went flying! Then the rest of the goats joined in, which was the point that the kobolds interfered. After all, while the boss wasn’t under them, the rest of the goats technically were.
Except some combination of the boss being, well, a boss as well as a matriarch, higher level, and generally just higher on the goat totem pole meant this did not go well. The cyclone goats were a bit trapped in the situation. Their new leader clearly was in charge, but dungeon laws put the kobolds as their leaders. This short-circuited them a bit, resulting in them freezing up.
The Matriarch did not take kindly to this. She wanted the fence gone and the kobolds not only tried to stop that, but also did something to Her herd. So she started kicking them instead of the fence.
‘Hm’, Doyle metaphorically stepped back from the situation. ‘That’s not good.’
Ally frowned, ‘No, no it’s not.’
Doyle gives a blanket order for everyone to stop and avoid the others. Which the boss ignores. At least it didn’t turn into a slaughter as the order to avoid others meant the kobolds ran from her as well as avoiding one another. Not all of them could escape, but spreading out meant it took more time for the angry raid boss to go after them.
Ally sighs, ‘Well, it was bound to happen. I guess having it happen with your first animal boss makes some sense. Though you’re also a bit low-level. Which, with how animals and monsters work, tends to be more important to them.
‘Well, I guess “levels” isn’t the proper thing? Rather, how developed your metaphysical side is. After all, levels are just how the system categorizes such things. More primal sorts can sense all that growth, either on your soul core, or in the area where the soul core would go.’
Doyle tilts to the side, ‘My stats are close to theirs and I’ve certainly got more skills and skill levels. I would think that despite my level, I would feel pretty powerful from a metaphysical point of view.’
Ally shrugs, ‘That is one thing the system warps a bit. After all, soul stuff isn’t physical, so any build-up is purely because a physical being expects it to. Well, and the fact that to a certain degree, power will push against power.
‘In fact, universes without something like the system will tend to put a focus on compressing the soul at higher levels of power. With the system, it is less of a problem, but also why the goat boss there isn’t feeling much from you.
‘If the soul was visualized as a tower with the soul core as the foundation, the system forces each floor of the tower to be the same height. Whereas, normally things just keep building upward. This doesn’t actually change the amount of space in the floor, the system simply forces it sideways. Which means you feel low-level to the goat, despite the fact that your soul as a building has more square footage.’
Doyle, ‘Well, that’s annoying.’
Ally nods, ‘A bit inconvenient, I will admit. Are you going to let her work out that aggression or do you have some idea to fix this misunderstanding?’
Doyle, ‘Well, I wouldn’t call it a misunderstanding. Both sides understand what is up. She wanted to remove the fence, which the kobolds didn’t mind. However, she also got the goats to help and the kobolds weren’t going to let their herd undo their work.
‘It only seems like nonsense because we're on the outside looking in. Oh sure, being fine with her breaking things, but not the goats might sound odd. Except, that kind of thing can happen easily enough in a number of situations. It is like how someone would get angry at a random person destroying a building despite the fact they have a crew off to the side waiting to demolish said building.’
Ally, ‘Fair, though that doesn’t answer how you’re going to resolve this. If you don’t get the boss under control, you might not be able to keep the kobolds around. Which seemed to be a bit important for this floor’s design. After all, without them there isn’t anything to prevent people from just sneaking around the goats.’
Doyle, ‘Haha, that’s easy enough, heh, I’m going to cheat.’
Comments
Black Esper
There's a typo: It only seems like nonsense because where (we're) on the outside looking in.
Black Esper
Thanks for the chapter. I like that the raid boss is not easy to boss around, even for Doyle 😁
