永斌 闫
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OJTTEG-Chapter 36: Short Story - The God’s Twisted Humor (Part One)
🕑 Added 2025-09-25 03:34:05 +0000 UTC[This marks the beginning, the first time Haunter encounters Nyarlathotep.]
...
I remember dying.
The current situation... how should I put it?
I know it's hard to believe, but I must accept the fact that I've been resurrected. I distinctly remember my last impression of the world being white—the white of a hospital room.
Now, aside from the darkness surrounding me, there's a peculiar being standing ahead. He's dressed in a black suit, his face obscured.
He stretches his arms in a slightly odd yet triumphant pose.
Ever since I gained consciousness, he's been standing motionless in front of me, and in contrast, I can't move either, except to turn my head or open my mouth.
His face is extremely blurry, and whenever I try to focus on it, I see various illusions. Attempting to see him clearly only leaves me dizzy for a while.
This man defies the laws of physics; despite the surrounding darkness, his figure is starkly visible, as if he's self-illuminated in a 3D model.
Oh, there's also a desk and a toilet behind him. It's an especially odd combination.
Do gods need to use the toilet too?
He remains silent, seemingly waiting for something.
Is he waiting for me to speak?
I stare at him, and he maintains his outstretched arms, unmoving. Like a statue.
"Hello?"
I try to initiate a conversation, like starting a dialogue with an NPC.
"Hello," the man replies.
"I suggest you stop staring at me like that; it could lead to trouble..."
"Alright... so, are you the one who brought me back?" I ask seriously.
"Yes, but wait, why does it feel like our roles are reversed?" he quickly points out the flaw.
"Heh."
"What do you mean by 'heh'?"
He finally opens his mouth. Although I can't clearly see it, there's a vague sense of a black hole-like thing opening and closing on his face.
"Anyway, you finally spoke. Holding this pose almost killed me."
"And where exactly are you feeling tired?" I counter.
"In my heart."
His tone sounds a bit playful, suggesting he might be an interesting character.
"But honestly, you're the first to joke with a god. Normally, beings become serious when they see me."
"You seem a bit unhappy?" he asks.
"If I'm not mistaken, there's something you need from me, right? I remember dying, so I shouldn't even be conscious."
"Yes."
Suddenly intrigued, he steps aside to reveal a laptop behind him.
Where did that laptop come from?
He doesn't seem to care about my surprise and points to the screen, drawing my attention.
"Please watch the VCR."
Some people dressed in black sit by a gravestone. A woman with tear-stained cheeks takes out a black tape recorder and presses play.
Knock, knock, knock! It's the sound of knocking on wood.
[Hey, how's it going? I'm Haunter. It's so dark here, so scary! Can anyone dig me out?]
The people around first look at the gravestone in shock. Then, as if realizing something collectively.
Pfft.
"Hahaha!"
The mourners can't help but laugh, and the atmosphere of joy quickly dispels the sorrow.
The entire memorial laughing together draws curious glances from those nearby.
"What an interesting prank," the man muses. "An intriguing soul, you've turned the sorrowful atmosphere upside down, and that's the essence of chaos."
"Thanks for the compliment. I actually had more fun ideas, but no chance to realize them."
"I noticed that," he seems to smile. "Your life was filled with joy and fun, especially with pranks that didn't trouble others. I love seeing that. But I want more."
"More, better," he repeats. "You must know, you have a very fascinating soul."
Is it coming? What exactly does he want from me?
"What do you need me to do?"
"After you're resurrected, make sure to pull all sorts of pranks."
"Huh? Pranks?"
"Didn't get it? Stir things up if you prefer. In simple terms, it's about muddying the waters," he explains. "Didn't expect your language skills to be so lacking."
"I'm not asking about that!" I exclaim in surprise. "Can you elaborate a bit more?"
"There are many adorable and unique creatures in this world, and your task is to find some fun with them. I'll be watching you, occasionally rewarding you—as long as you don't stop creating chaos."
Like with cats and dogs? If that's the case, there are indeed endless ways to amuse oneself.
For instance, I have 199 ways to tease a tabby cat. Those dim-witted felines are the best to mess with.
I take another look at the man whose face remains unclear.
Who would've thought, this seemingly straightforward guy is an animal enthusiast.
The god enthusiastically wraps an arm around my shoulders. Being so close, I catch a whiff of an odd scent—like cleaning products. Why does he smell like that?
"You should know how I died in my past life," I reply. "If I come back and die young again, I’ll have a lot of complaints."
After all, my parents must have been heartbroken after I passed, and my little stunt at the funeral was just to ease their pain a bit.
"Organ failure. I know, dying at 24 must have left you with many regrets. So, I'll give you a perfectly healthy body. Barring any external factors, you won't die of illness."
"Sounds good."
I have to admit, I'm tempted.
"This task is really simple. I believe you can definitely survive."
Oh my, is this another world where I have to stir things up for fun? Like in the novels I read in my past life, am I finally getting a chance at a cheat-filled life?
It sounds like an interesting world.
"Oh! That sounds great," I suddenly regain my confidence. "If it's about causing a ruckus, I'm quite skilled at that..."
Wait.
I heard something odd.
"What do you mean by 'able to survive'? And what exactly is this chaos creation about?" I ask cautiously, looking up as if trying to glean some information from his face.
